A good wife is one who serves her husband in the morning like a

Chanakya, the ancient teacher, philosopher, and political strategist of India, once declared with uncompromising clarity: “A good wife is one who serves her husband in the morning like a mother does, loves him in the day like a sister does, and pleases him like a prostitute in the night.” These words, though startling to the modern ear, carry within them the wisdom of an age that sought to describe harmony in relationships by drawing upon roles that were deeply familiar in the cultural imagination of his time. They are not meant merely as rules for women, but as a vision of balance, intimacy, and the sustaining power of devotion within the household.

At its heart, the teaching recognizes that marriage is not one-dimensional. A union between husband and wife must encompass nurture, companionship, and passion — all three. The reference to the mother at dawn symbolizes care, protection, and the tending of daily needs. Just as a mother ensures her child begins the day in strength and safety, so too, says Chanakya, does a good partner support and steady the other at the start of life’s battles each day.

The sister’s love by day speaks to companionship and respect. In the hours of daylight, when both partners move among the duties of the world, the bond must be marked by affection, equality, and trust. Just as siblings protect and encourage one another, so too must spouses provide friendship and loyalty during the labors of daily life. Without this fraternal element, marriage becomes cold service or lust alone — lacking the warmth of true fellowship.

Finally, the prostitute’s passion by night is not a denigration, but an acknowledgment of the power of desire and intimacy in binding two souls. In the dark hours, when the world recedes, physical union strengthens emotional union. Chanakya speaks plainly, for he knew that to deny this element is to weaken the bond of marriage. Just as kings guarded their alliances with rituals of diplomacy, so too is the marriage bed a place where loyalty and intimacy are renewed.

History provides echoes of this teaching. In many cultures, the stability of kingdoms and households alike rested upon the strength of the marriage bond. Consider the partnership of Queen Victoria and Prince Albert, where devotion, friendship, and deep intimacy formed a union that influenced the moral life of an empire. Or think of the letters between Marcus Aurelius and Faustina, which reveal not only imperial duty but affection, friendship, and the intimacies of married life. Such examples show that when nurture, companionship, and passion are joined together, a marriage becomes not a mere contract but a fortress of love.

Yet, Chanakya’s words also serve as a warning. A marriage that lacks nurture will starve the soul. One without companionship will breed loneliness. One without intimacy will wither. All three must be present if the union is to flourish. Though his imagery is drawn from the social realities of his own era, the principle remains universal: wholeness in marriage requires many forms of love.

The lesson for us is clear: whether husband or wife, seek to provide your partner with care in times of need, companionship in the struggles of daily life, and intimacy in the private hours of the night. A strong union is not built on one kind of love, but on many — layered, balanced, and renewed each day. To those who would marry, do not seek perfection in one role alone, but the weaving together of all roles that sustain life.

Thus Chanakya, master of strategy, speaks not only of politics but of the household, reminding us that the smallest kingdom — the home — must also be ruled by balance, respect, and passion. Children of tomorrow, take heed: a marriage nourished by motherly care, sibling-like loyalty, and passionate desire will endure through storms, for it has roots in every part of the human heart.