All children will do things that you may not want them to.

Hearken, O children of generations yet to come, and attend to the words of Carl Hart, whose voice speaks with the clarity of experience and the patience of the ages: “All children will do things that you may not want them to. That's part of parenting.” In these words lies a profound recognition: that the labor of raising young is neither orderly nor predictable, but a journey through the unpredictable heart of life, where learning, growth, and virtue are forged through challenge, error, and guidance.

The origin of this reflection rests in Hart’s life as a parent and observer of human behavior, where he witnessed the ceaseless curiosity, defiance, and experimentation that mark the young. Children, by nature, test boundaries, make errors, and act contrary to expectation. Hart’s insight is timeless: the essence of parenting is not control, but the cultivation of patience, guidance, and understanding, recognizing that missteps are as instructive as obedience and as essential to development as love itself.

The meaning of his words is both practical and moral. To expect perfection or compliance is to misunderstand the nature of the child. Every act of disobedience, every experiment with boundaries, is an opportunity for teaching, reflection, and moral guidance. Parenting, therefore, is an exercise in discernment, empathy, and steady resolve, balancing authority with nurturing care, and transforming moments of frustration into lessons of responsibility and understanding.

Consider the example of Benjamin Franklin, who, in raising his son William, encountered acts of disobedience and rebellion. Franklin did not suppress the boy’s curiosity, but guided it with reasoned counsel, reflection, and moral instruction. Through this process, he taught resilience, discernment, and ethical thought. Like Hart observes, the child’s divergence from expectation is not a failure of parenting, but a natural path through which virtue and character may be cultivated.

Yet Hart’s words carry a subtle admonition: the challenges of parenting are not merely external, but require the cultivation of inner patience and equanimity. Frustration, anger, or impatience in response to a child’s missteps can fracture understanding and impede growth. Wisdom lies in recognizing that all children will act contrary to desire, and that guidance, rather than coercion or judgment, is the path to nurture both learning and moral development.

The lesson for future generations is radiant: embrace the unpredictability of children as a natural part of their growth. Anticipate missteps, prepare to teach through example, and transform moments of difficulty into opportunities for moral and emotional development. The child’s independence, curiosity, and even defiance are not threats, but instruments through which resilience, discernment, and virtue are instilled.

In practical life, one may follow Hart’s counsel by cultivating patience, observation, and thoughtful guidance. Attend to the child’s actions without harsh judgment, reflect upon each deviation, and offer instruction grounded in love, clarity, and ethical reasoning. Recognize the natural course of exploration, test, and error as essential to learning, and guide the child with steadfast attention and compassion.

Thus, O children of future ages, carry this teaching as both lantern and shield: all children will do things that may not please, and this is the essence of parenting. Meet their actions with patience, teach through example, and cultivate understanding and moral guidance. In this enduring labor lies the shaping of character, the cultivation of virtue, and the legacy of love, patience, and wisdom that will illuminate generations yet to come.