Growing up, my dad was 'get a real job, don't go pursuing your
Growing up, my dad was 'get a real job, don't go pursuing your dreams, that's how you become homeless.' So, do I pick my family or do I pick my own happiness, and how much does my own happiness depend on my family?
Yes — that quote is correctly attributed to Jimmy O. Yang, the Hong Kong–born American actor, stand-up comedian, and writer best known for his roles in Silicon Valley, Crazy Rich Asians, and Space Force.
“Growing up, my dad was ‘get a real job, don't go pursuing your dreams, that's how you become homeless.’ So, do I pick my family or do I pick my own happiness, and how much does my own happiness depend on my family?”
— Jimmy O. Yang
Context and Background
Jimmy O. Yang shared this reflection in interviews and his memoir How to American: An Immigrant’s Guide to Disappointing Your Parents (2018), where he explores the tension between traditional immigrant expectations and personal ambition.
Raised in a Chinese immigrant household in Los Angeles, Yang faced the common parental pressure to pursue a “safe” career path rather than something uncertain like comedy or acting. This quote captures the emotional crossroads he experienced — the struggle to honor family values while pursuing self-expression and happiness in a risky creative field.
Interpretation
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“Get a real job… that's how you become homeless” — reflects his father’s practical, fear-driven advice rooted in immigrant experience and survival.
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“Do I pick my family or my own happiness?” — expresses the universal conflict between duty and individuality, especially in immigrant families.
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“How much does my own happiness depend on my family?” — reveals introspection about identity, belonging, and emotional independence.
Summary
Jimmy O. Yang’s quote encapsulates a heartfelt and often humorous theme of his work: the immigrant balancing act between tradition and personal freedom. It’s a candid acknowledgment of how love, cultural duty, and self-fulfillment can sometimes collide — and how finding peace means learning to honor both one’s roots and one’s dreams.
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