I gave a funny speech at my wife's birthday party, and I'm

I gave a funny speech at my wife's birthday party, and I'm thinking, 'Hey, I've still got it.'

- Larry David -

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Larry David

American - Actor Born: July 2, 1947

With the author

Women love a self-confident bald man.

Larry David

I think we're all good and bad, but good's not funny. Bad is funny. Suppress the good and let the bad out, and then you can be funny.

Larry David

Every relationship is just so tenuous and precarious.

Larry David

Most people are completely unaware of their breath. They violate your space, they have no idea that they have halitosis.

Larry David

Religion doesn't play any part in my life in terms of how I live my life. But I don't think I've ever gone through a day in my life without hearing someone say the word 'Jew' or saying it myself.

Larry David

When you're not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom.

Larry David

Same category

Having a Mary Poppins-themed birthday party when I was 5 - all my friends went in dresses, and I went as a chimney sweep. I was a real tomboy.

Poppy Delevingne

May it be long before the people of the United States shall cease to take a deep and pervading interest in the Fourth of July, as the birthday of our national life, or the event which then occurred shall be subordinated to any other of our national history.

Samuel Freeman Miller

When it comes to birthdays, I think there are two camps. There are people like me, who choose to treat it like any other day, and then there are the 'birthday people.' You know, those people who claim the full month in which they were born as their own.

Dan Levy

Reaching F1 was always the ultimate goal, I suppose, ever since driving a go-kart my father had bought me for my fifth birthday.

Lance Stroll

My happiest memory of childhood was my first birthday in reform school. This teacher took an interest in me. In fact, he gave me the first birthday presents I ever got: a box of Cracker Jacks and a can of ABC shoe polish.

Flip Wilson

Sinatra invited me once to his birthday party in L.A. I was young, and I felt great about it. But when I got there, the Rat Pack were all in the kitchen laughing their heads off.

Tony Bennett

I don't really remember, but I'm positive that whenever I cried, my mother gave me something to eat. I'm sure that whenever I had a fight with the little girl next door, or it was raining and I couldn't go out, or I wasn't invited to a birthday party, my mother gave me a piece of candy to make me feel better.

Jean Nidetch

My grandma spelled my name wrong until she died. Like literally, birthday cards, mail, everything.

Willam Belli

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