I get whatever placidity I have from my father. But my mother

Norma Shearer, the luminous star of Hollywood’s golden age, once spoke with piercing honesty: “I get whatever placidity I have from my father. But my mother taught me how to take it on the chin.” In these words, she reveals the dual inheritance of temperament and resilience. From her father, she received a calmness of spirit, the gift of placidity, which allows one to meet life’s storms without panic. From her mother, she gained a fiercer wisdom—the ability to endure blows, to rise after defeat, to face hardship unflinching. Together, these qualities form a balanced soul, capable of both serenity and strength.

The origin of this saying rests in Shearer’s own life, one marked not by ease but by struggle. Born in Montreal, she faced early hardships: financial instability, the weight of her family’s troubles, and physical challenges that others believed would bar her from becoming an actress. Yet she rose from these limitations to become one of the greatest stars of her time. Her acknowledgment of her parents’ influence is not mere sentiment, but recognition that character is inheritance—that who we become is shaped not only by our own will, but also by the examples set before us in the hearth of childhood.

History echoes this wisdom. Consider the life of Abraham Lincoln. From his father, he inherited the strength to labor on the frontier, but from his mother, he gained a gentleness of heart and the capacity to endure sorrow. When he lost children of his own, when the nation tore itself in two, he carried both of these legacies: the calm steadiness of his paternal blood, and the ability to bear grief without collapse from his maternal side. Like Shearer, he was formed by the fusion of serenity and resilience.

The phrase “take it on the chin” comes from the language of boxing, conjuring the image of a fighter receiving a direct blow yet refusing to fall. In this, Shearer’s mother imparted the lesson of courage in adversity. Life will strike, sometimes with cruelty, and no one escapes without scars. To take it on the chin is not to be unhurt, but to be unbroken—to meet the strike with dignity, to rise again, and to continue the contest. It is the teaching of all mothers who whisper to their children: “Do not crumble. Stand. You are stronger than you think.”

There is also profound wisdom in the contrast Shearer names. Placidity without resilience can become passivity, a calm that falters when storms grow violent. Resilience without placidity can become harshness, a spirit hardened beyond tenderness. But together, the two form harmony: the ability to remain calm in trial, and the strength to endure when calmness alone will not suffice. This balance is the mark of a fully-formed character, able to navigate both peace and struggle.

The lesson for all who hear is clear: recognize the inheritance of your ancestors, and honor the qualities they have passed down. Cherish the calmness that steadies you in moments of chaos, but also embrace the strength that teaches you to rise when struck. Do not despise hardship, for it is in hardship that resilience is forged, and it is in endurance that character is revealed.

Practical wisdom flows from this: parents, remember that what you live, your children will learn. Give them not only comfort, but also preparation for struggle. Show them not only how to be gentle, but how to endure with courage. Children, when you face the blows of life, recall the examples of your mothers and fathers. From their calmness, draw patience; from their resilience, draw courage. In this way, you will live as heirs not merely of blood, but of virtue.

Thus, Norma Shearer’s words shine beyond her own story. They are the testimony of a soul shaped by two legacies—the serenity of her father and the endurance of her mother. Take this wisdom into your own life: seek both peace and strength, calm and courage. For in the union of these virtues lies the power to endure every trial and to live with dignity, no matter what storms may come.