I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine

In the vast tapestry of human experience, there are many struggles, and some are born not from the challenges of the world around us, but from the roles and expectations placed upon us by society itself. Gloria Steinem, a beacon of the feminist movement, once spoke of the subtle inequality that permeates our lives with the words: “I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine marriage and a career.” This statement, simple yet striking, uncovers the layers of gender inequality, expectation, and the invisible burdens that women have carried throughout history. In her words, we hear the echo of an age-old struggle—one where the work of balancing personal ambition and family obligations is a concern primarily for women, while men are rarely, if ever, forced to reckon with this particular tension.

In the ancient world, there were roles assigned to each gender, and women were often bound to the home, tasked with raising children and maintaining the household. Socrates, the great philosopher, spoke of the necessity for a good and virtuous life, but he did not extend this same expectation to women in the same way he did to men. Women’s duties were primarily seen as domestic, while men were expected to engage in the world of public discourse, war, and philosophy. Over time, however, this structure began to show its cracks, and the call for equality grew louder, until voices like Steinem’s broke through, demanding the redefinition of roles that had long been set in stone. Steinem’s quote speaks to the invisible labor women face—an additional layer of stress and sacrifice that is often overlooked by those who do not walk the same path.

Consider the example of Cleopatra, the queen of Egypt, who was not only a ruler but also had to navigate the delicate dance of power, family obligations, and the political alliances of her time. Cleopatra was one of the first women in history to openly wield political power, yet her role as a ruler was entangled with her relationships with men like Julius Caesar and Mark Antony. Her career as a ruler was inextricably linked with her personal life, and every decision she made in the realm of power had to be weighed against the pressures of her family and gender expectations. In her case, there was no room for the luxury of advice on how to balance these forces—she simply had to endure, and like so many women before and after her, her legacy became a combination of public triumph and personal sacrifice.

Steinem’s words also highlight the double standard that persists in many cultures—the idea that men can pursue their ambitions without the same scrutiny or expectation placed on their personal lives. When men rise to positions of power or prestige, the question is never asked: How do you balance your career with your family responsibilities? Instead, their careers are seen as separate from their roles as husbands or fathers. Aristotle, for example, while regarded as one of the great thinkers of the ancient world, never once mentioned the difficulties faced by women in balancing their roles as both mothers and citizens. Women, it seems, were never given the same room to aspire, to create, or to lead without being simultaneously bound by the expectation of domesticity.

In the modern age, however, Steinem’s reflection shines a light on the realities that women face in the workplace and at home. As gender roles have evolved, the pressures on women to succeed in both their careers and personal lives have only grown. Today, we find women in positions of leadership, working across every field of endeavor, from politics to business, to the arts. But even as women take on these roles, they still face questions and judgments that their male counterparts rarely, if ever, experience. It is as though society still expects women to perform the balancing act of being successful at work while simultaneously being the caretaker, the nurturer, and the keeper of the home.

The lesson in Steinem’s words is both personal and universal. It reminds us that the expectations placed on women throughout history were not natural or inevitable, but rather the result of rigid, societal constructs. Women have fought long and hard to break free from these roles, and while great strides have been made, the battle for true equality continues. Steinem’s statement calls on us to reflect on how we, as individuals and as a society, continue to impose unequal expectations on different genders. The question Steinem asks is not just one about career and marriage, but about how we define value and success in the modern world. What does it mean to be successful? What does it mean to be fulfilled?

The practical action for us, as inheritors of this world, is to challenge these unequal expectations and create a society where everyone—regardless of gender—can pursue their dreams without the added burden of society’s judgment. We must recognize that each individual’s path is their own to forge, and their worth is not defined by how well they balance the demands of career and family, but by the integrity and honor with which they pursue their calling. Let us work to build a world where men and women are equally supported in their aspirations, where no one is made to feel that they must choose between their personal lives and their professional dreams, but are allowed to thrive in both. Only then will we achieve a true balance, one that honors the humanity of all.