I met Peter O'Toole for the first time at Dad's memorial service

Hearken, O seekers of wisdom, and attend to the words of Jared Harris, a voice shaped by lineage and reflection, who recalls: “I met Peter O'Toole for the first time at Dad's memorial service because my Dad didn't hang around with people like that when we were around. We didn't grow up with Richard Burton coming around to tea.” At first glance, these words may appear as a simple reminiscence, yet beneath them lies a profound meditation on humility, family values, and the shaping of character apart from fame or grandeur. The ancients understood that virtue and wisdom are forged not in the company of greatness alone, but in the integrity of ordinary life.

Harris begins with the principle of humble upbringing amidst greatness. Though his father moved in circles that included luminaries like O'Toole and Burton, the young Harris did not grow accustomed to spectacle or privilege. In this restraint, we find the wisdom of the Stoics, who taught that character is strengthened by simplicity, by immersion in the ordinary rather than indulgence in admiration of the extraordinary. By shielding his children from the glare of fame, his father nurtured humility and groundedness.

The essence of this wisdom lies in learning values from presence, not spectacle. One may be surrounded by renown or wealth, yet it is the quiet, daily examples that shape the heart and mind. Consider Marcus Aurelius, whose tutors and household guides imparted lessons of integrity, duty, and resilience; he was not taught by the applause of crowds, but by the quiet cultivation of virtue in daily life. Harris’ recollection reminds us that true guidance comes from consistent example, not celebrity.

Harris’ reflection also speaks to the careful curation of influence. His father chose which presences would shape his children, reserving exposure to fame and brilliance for circumstances appropriate to reflection and appreciation. History offers similar examples: in the apprenticeship of young Michelangelo, exposure to masterful art and learned men was guided and deliberate, ensuring that influence cultivated skill and character rather than distraction or vanity. The father, in this, becomes the steward of wisdom and moral formation.

The quote further illuminates the eventual encounter with greatness and its reflective power. Harris meets O’Toole not in the context of childhood intimacy, but at a memorial, where the encounter carries weight and meaning. In life, many are destined to meet greatness, yet the timing of such encounters matters, offering lessons rather than indulgence. Consider Galileo, who met patrons and scholars in the proper seasons of his studies, each encounter enriching his understanding and guiding his work. Context shapes comprehension and appreciation.

From this reflection emerges a practical lesson: cultivate humility and discernment in early life, and allow exposure to greatness to enrich, not define, your character. Do not confuse proximity to fame with moral or personal superiority; learn instead from consistent example, daily habits, and the integrity of those closest to you. Like Harris, the true encounter with greatness becomes meaningful when it is framed by values instilled long before.

Practically, this calls for intentionality in the company you keep and the models you follow. Surround yourself with mentors who demonstrate virtue and diligence, not simply renown. Observe, emulate, and absorb wisdom from those who act with integrity in daily life, allowing fame or brilliance to inspire rather than distract. In this way, personal development precedes admiration, grounding the soul in substance rather than spectacle.

Thus, let it be known: true formation comes not from proximity to greatness alone, but from the guidance, values, and integrity of those who nurture us in ordinary life. Walk with humility, observe the virtues of those closest to you, and encounter brilliance with gratitude and reflection. In this alignment, character is forged, understanding deepened, and the soul prepared to meet the extraordinary with wisdom and discernment.