I want to be very close to someone I respect and admire and have

In the words of Richard Bach, "I want to be very close to someone I respect and admire and have somebody who feels the same way about me." These words speak to the deepest desires of the human heart—to connect with others on a level that transcends mere acquaintance, to find a bond built not just on shared experiences, but on the foundation of mutual respect and admiration. In seeking such a relationship, Bach taps into the ancient human longing for a connection that is pure, authentic, and nurturing. It is not simply companionship that he desires, but a deep communion of souls, bound by respect for one another’s character and values.

The ancients understood the profound significance of such connections. Aristotle, in his Nicomachean Ethics, spoke of philia, the type of friendship that goes beyond utility or pleasure, to one where two souls are bound together by virtue and respect. For Aristotle, such relationships were the highest form of companionship, for they were rooted in a shared commitment to goodness and truth. Bach’s words reflect this ancient wisdom: the deepest and most fulfilling connections are not those of convenience or fleeting emotions, but those where each person truly respects and admires the other for who they are at their core.

Consider the story of Socrates and his relationship with his disciples, particularly Plato. Though Socrates was known for his relentless questioning and his pursuit of wisdom, his greatest legacy was the mutual respect he cultivated with those who followed him. Plato not only respected Socrates as a teacher but admired the way his master lived and sought the truth. This bond of respect and admiration was so strong that Plato dedicated much of his life to spreading the teachings of Socrates, ensuring that his mentor’s values would continue to shape future generations. In this story, we see a powerful example of the connection Bach desires—one built on respect, where each individual’s character is valued and admired, and the connection between them becomes a source of mutual growth and fulfillment.

Throughout history, great leaders and philosophers have often spoken of the importance of respect and admiration in relationships. Confucius, for example, believed that the highest form of relationship was one rooted in mutual respect and the shared pursuit of moral excellence. He taught that true friendship is not based on superficial qualities but on the alignment of values and the cultivation of virtue. Confucius emphasized that, in such relationships, each person inspires the other to be better, to strive toward higher moral standards. In this light, Bach’s desire for a connection built on respect and admiration is not just a personal longing but a recognition of the power such relationships hold to elevate both individuals.

There is also a more personal, intimate form of connection that Bach seeks—one that embodies reciprocity. It is not enough for one to simply respect and admire the other; both individuals must feel the same. This idea of mutual admiration is vital in all meaningful relationships. Plato speaks of the relationship between Socrates and his students as one of mutual respect, where the mentor and mentee benefit equally from their connection. The student gains wisdom and guidance, while the teacher gains fulfillment and growth from the wisdom of his disciples. In this way, the bond of respect is never one-sided, but rather reciprocal, as each person in the relationship shares in the other’s journey toward greater understanding and enlightenment.

Bach’s words also remind us of the importance of authenticity in relationships. To be truly close to someone is not to wear a mask or to play a role but to reveal one’s true self. The connections that matter most are those where each person is valued not for their achievements or their appearances, but for the essence of who they are. The relationship that Bach desires is one built on the truth of each person’s character, a place where both individuals can be vulnerable, honest, and deeply connected without fear of judgment. This is the heart of true intimacy—the space where respect and admiration allow each individual to flourish in their most authentic form.

The lesson we take from Bach’s words is one of profound significance: to seek relationships where respect, admiration, and authenticity are the guiding principles. These are not relationships built on convenience or superficial attraction but on shared values, mutual understanding, and the deep joy that comes from seeing another for who they truly are. In our own lives, let us strive to cultivate such connections—whether in friendships, family, or romantic relationships—where each person can honor and admire the other, and where the bond between them elevates both. Let us seek, as Bach does, the kind of relationship that becomes a source of growth, fulfillment, and joy, one built on the sacred foundation of respect.