I want to start dating the man that I'm gonna marry. I want to

There are seasons in a person’s life — the season of discovery, the season of passion, and, at last, the season of wisdom. It was from such a place of earned truth that LisaRaye McCoy-Misick spoke when she declared: “I want to start dating the man that I’m gonna marry. I want to start having some fun with someone that I know I’m gonna be with. I don’t play any games. I’m too old for that. I’ve been there; I’ve been around the block.” These words are not born of impatience, but of clarity — the clarity that comes when one has walked through love’s illusions and survived its lessons. Hers is the voice of one who no longer chases the thrill of uncertainty, but seeks the peace of purpose.

In her quote, LisaRaye speaks for all those who have reached the sacred turning point between youthful longing and mature intention. There comes a time when the heart, weathered but unbroken, ceases to crave the chase and instead yearns for meaning. To “start dating the man that I’m gonna marry” is not merely to seek a husband — it is to seek alignment, to walk beside one whose soul mirrors your own, whose laughter does not vanish with the night, and whose promises endure beyond passion’s first flame. It is the declaration of a spirit that has known disappointment, yet still believes in love refined by truth.

This sentiment echoes through the corridors of history. Consider Penelope, wife of Odysseus, who waited faithfully as the years rolled over her like waves upon the shore. Suitors came with false intentions, each seeking her for vanity or gain. Yet Penelope’s heart was anchored not in the games of courtship, but in the quiet assurance of real devotion. She, like LisaRaye, was too wise for deceit. Her patience was not weakness but discernment, and in the end, her truth was rewarded. For she knew, as every seasoned heart must, that love built on honesty endures far beyond love born of infatuation.

When LisaRaye says, “I don’t play any games. I’m too old for that,” she is not speaking of age, but of evolution. There is a kind of exhaustion that comes from performing in love’s theater — pretending disinterest, feigning mystery, hiding one’s real desires for fear of rejection. Such games once felt thrilling, but to the mature soul, they ring hollow. The one who has “been around the block” has seen the cycle of beginnings and endings, the sweetness that turns to sorrow when truth is delayed. From that wisdom rises the courage to love with transparency, to say, “This is who I am, and this is what I seek.”

This is not cynicism — it is purity reborn. To desire joy “with someone I know I’m gonna be with” is to seek the rare union where laughter and stability coexist, where romance no longer dances on the edge of uncertainty but rests in mutual trust. It is a vision of love not as conquest, but as companionship, where both souls are travelers walking the same path toward peace. The ancients might have called it philia — the love of shared virtue and understanding — deeper than passion, yet warmer than reason.

History, too, gives us examples of such transformation. Queen Victoria, after the death of Prince Albert, once said she could never again find such unity, for their bond had transcended desire — it had become a merging of purpose. What began as attraction matured into alliance, into a love that made both more whole. So too does LisaRaye’s vision of love stand as a modern echo of that ancient truth: that the heart’s highest calling is not to be entertained, but to be fulfilled.

Thus, her words carry a lesson for all who seek love in an age of distraction: Grow from the games, and move toward the goal. Seek not the fleeting validation of attention, but the enduring joy of connection. Ask not, “Who excites me today?” but “Who will walk beside me tomorrow?” Love is not the fire that burns brightest at first light, but the one that survives the storm and still glows warm in the quiet hours.

So let this teaching be written upon the soul: When you have learned enough from the winding road of romance, have the courage to walk it with purpose. Be honest in your desires, steadfast in your standards, and patient in your waiting. For the one who no longer plays games will find, in time, a love that plays none either — a love that is steady, sincere, and strong enough to last a lifetime. As LisaRaye reminds us, the truest hearts do not seek drama; they seek destiny.