In terms of wedding gifts, I like to buy people experiences.

In these thoughtful words, Alexander Gilkes speaks to the enduring value of experience over material possessions. By declaring, “In terms of wedding gifts, I like to buy people experiences,” he emphasizes the profound power of memory and shared moments over fleeting objects. To give an experience is to offer something that lives not on a shelf, but within the hearts and minds of those who receive it, a gift that deepens bonds and creates stories that endure. Gilkes’ philosophy reminds us that true generosity nourishes the soul, not merely the eyes.

The origin of this insight lies in the ancient understanding of human joy and celebration. Across civilizations, gifts were often intended not merely to display wealth, but to cultivate connection and communal pleasure. In ancient Rome, for instance, lavish banquets and spectacles were given to honor marriage, celebrate alliances, and create lasting memories. The gift was a bridge between giver and recipient, an enduring symbol of goodwill. Gilkes’ modern emphasis on experiences reflects this same ancient wisdom, adapted to contemporary values that prize shared adventure and personal growth.

Consider the historical example of the Renaissance courts of Florence, where patrons of the arts would commission performances, feasts, and musical celebrations for weddings. These experiences, not mere objects, became treasured stories, passed down through generations and remembered long after any tangible gift had faded. Like Gilkes’ practice, the focus was on creating moments that enriched life itself, rather than on possessions that might be admired but soon forgotten.

His philosophy also carries a subtle moral teaching: the measure of a gift is not in its price, but in its impact on human experience. A carefully chosen experience—a concert, a journey, a shared adventure—can cultivate joy, wonder, and connection far beyond the material value of a gold or silver object. It teaches future generations that gifts should enrich the spirit as well as honor the occasion.

Ultimately, Alexander Gilkes’ words are a meditation on presence, memory, and the art of giving. They remind us that love and celebration are most powerfully expressed through moments that touch the heart, not merely the eye. Let this teaching endure: the truest gifts are those that transform time into memory, ordinary days into shared joy, and simple acts into stories that echo across the lives of those who partake in them. Through such gifts, weddings are not only celebrated—they are lived and remembered.