It is easier for a father to have children than for children to

“It is easier for a father to have children than for children to have a real father.” — these words of Pope John XXIII echo through the corridors of time like the tolling of an ancient bell, calling men to remembrance of their sacred duty. To beget life is a simple act, fleeting as the spark that leaps from flint and stone. But to nurture life, to shape the soul of a child, that is a work of art, a labor of love, and a test of the spirit. Many men can sow the seed of life, but few possess the steadfast heart, the patient wisdom, and the tender strength to raise it into fullness.

The ancients knew this truth well. They revered the figure of the father not as a mere provider, but as a guide of destiny, a living pillar upon which the house of generations was built. In the home, the father was the quiet sun — his light not always seen, but ever felt. Yet in our age, that light often flickers. Too many fathers exist in form but not in presence. They provide bread but not counsel, protection but not affection. The world has many men, but it still thirsts for real fathers — men who stand not only in authority, but in love.

Consider the tale of Marcus Aurelius, the Roman Emperor and Stoic philosopher. Though burdened with the weight of empire, he wrote nightly reflections — the Meditations — not for the world, but for himself and his son. He taught through the example of discipline, humility, and reflection. Yet even Marcus, wise as he was, lamented that his son Commodus did not inherit the spirit of virtue he sought to instill. This story reminds us that fatherhood is not merely transmission of blood, but of soul. It is not enough to create; one must also awaken, through example and love, the inner greatness of those who follow.

To be a real father is to labor in silence, to sacrifice without applause. It is to rise in the cold dawn and teach by doing — to show what courage looks like in hardship, what honesty means when it costs you something, what compassion feels like when pride would prefer anger. A real father does not command respect by fear, but earns it through steadfastness. His strength is not loud; it is steady as the earth. His heart is not unyielding; it bends, so his children may grow upright.

There was once a humble carpenter in a small village of Nazareth — Joseph, the earthly father of Christ. He is remembered not for grand speeches or mighty deeds, but for his faithful silence. He listened more than he spoke, worked more than he rested, and trusted more than he questioned. His fatherhood was not adorned with glory but with grace. Through him, the world learned that true strength lies in service, and true authority in love. Such is the heart of the real father — unseen by the world, but eternal in the soul of the child.

Children, too, must awaken to this truth. They must learn that a real father is not always perfect, but always trying. He may stumble beneath the burdens of life, yet his love is a compass, even when veiled by weariness. To honor one’s father is to see beyond his faults and to recognize his quiet battles. The child who learns gratitude learns to see the sacredness in the ordinary — in the calloused hands, the stern eyes that soften unseen, the silent prayers offered each night.

The lesson of this saying is both simple and eternal: Fatherhood is not a moment, but a lifelong covenant. It demands not only the giving of life, but the giving of self. Those who would be fathers must remember that the world needs their presence more than their perfection. And those who are children must remember that love, when returned with understanding, can heal what time and distance may have wounded.

So, my child, if you would walk the path of the wise — be a real father if fate grants you children, and be a grateful child if you have known the touch of one. Speak less, listen more. Guide not with anger, but with example. Build not only houses, but hearts. For in doing so, you will fulfill the deepest truth of Pope John’s words — that while it is easy to bring forth life, it is divine to raise it with love.