Love seeks one thing only: the good of the one loved. It leaves

“Love seeks one thing only: the good of the one loved. It leaves all the other secondary effects to take care of themselves. Love, therefore, is its own reward.” – Thomas Merton

So speaks Thomas Merton, the monk-poet who withdrew from the noise of the world to better hear the voice of truth. In these words, he unveils the pure essence of love — that it exists not for gain, nor for pleasure, nor for recognition, but for the simple, sacred desire that the beloved may flourish. True love asks for nothing in return. It is a river that flows because it must, not because it expects a harvest from the fields it waters. It gives, and in giving, finds fulfillment. This is what Merton means when he says “love is its own reward.” To love purely is to touch the divine, for the divine itself loves in this way — freely, unconditionally, eternally.

The origin of this wisdom lies deep in the human soul, where selflessness wrestles with desire. Merton, a man who lived amid both silence and struggle, saw that the world often confuses love with possession. Men claim to love when they wish to own; women claim to love when they wish to be adored. But such love is counterfeit — it seeks not the good of the beloved, but the satisfaction of the self. True love, by contrast, seeks only goodness, even if that goodness means letting go. It rejoices not in what it receives, but in what it gives. And when it gives freely, it becomes holy.

The ancients knew this truth well. The philosopher Aristotle spoke of friendship as the purest form of love, for it wills the good of the other for their own sake. Likewise, in the Gospels, love is not measured by feeling, but by sacrifice — “Greater love hath no man than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” Merton, standing in that long lineage of spiritual thinkers, reminds us that love’s power lies in its purity, not in its reciprocity. The sun does not demand the flower’s gratitude; it shines so that life may grow. So too does love exist for the sake of life itself, not for what it may receive in return.

Consider the life of Mother Teresa, who walked the streets of Calcutta with nothing but faith and tenderness. She did not serve the dying and the destitute for fame, for wealth, or even for comfort. She served because she loved — and her love sought only the good of those who suffered. When asked how she could bear such pain, she answered, “I am not called to be successful, but to be faithful.” That is Merton’s teaching in action: love does not concern itself with the outcome; it is complete in the act of giving. Even when unrecognized, love fulfills its purpose by existing.

When Merton says that love leaves all other secondary effects to take care of themselves, he means that love does not calculate. It does not ask, “Will this be returned?” or “Will this bring me joy?” It simply does what is right — and trusts that goodness will find its way. In this sense, love is an act of faith. It plants seeds that it may never see bloom, and yet believes the garden will flourish. It is not blind — it is brave. It releases control and chooses trust.

And yet, the paradox is this: when one loves without seeking reward, one finds the deepest joy. The heart that loves selflessly is never empty, for it draws its strength from the inexhaustible well of the spirit. To love another for their sake is to rise above the confines of the ego, to taste eternity while still bound to earth. That is why Merton says, “Love is its own reward.” The act itself ennobles the soul; the gift itself sanctifies the giver.

So, my child of the present age, if you would love rightly, then love freely. Do not measure affection by what it brings you, but by how much good it brings to another. Speak kindness without expectation. Forgive without condition. Give without counting the cost. For when love seeks only the good of the one loved, it becomes more than human — it becomes divine. And in that sacred giving, you will find your truest joy, your quiet reward, and your place among the timeless hearts who understood that to love is to live rightly, and to love selflessly is to live forever.