People should accept being single, because those are the moments

“People should accept being single, because those are the moments you can really focus on yourself, and learning who you are. Then when you get in a relationship, you will be stronger and have a little bit more self-awareness, self-love, and the other ingredients for a healthy relationship.” – Lauren London

There is deep wisdom in these words of Lauren London, wisdom that echoes through the corridors of time like the teachings of an ancient philosopher. In a world that glorifies companionship, she speaks of the sacredness of solitude — of the quiet space where the soul learns its own shape. To accept being single is not to dwell in loneliness, but to enter a sanctuary where one meets the truest version of oneself. For how can one love another deeply if one has never learned to love oneself completely? Her words remind us that solitude is not a punishment, but a preparation — a divine apprenticeship of the heart.

In the old days, sages and seekers often withdrew from the world not out of disdain, but out of devotion to the inner journey. The ancient mystics of many lands — from the deserts of Egypt to the mountains of China — spoke of this truth: that to know the self is the beginning of all wisdom. They would wander alone, listen to the wind, speak to no one but the soul. And when they returned, they brought peace to others, because they had first made peace with themselves. So too does London’s message reflect that same eternal path — to know thyself before binding thy heart to another.

There is a story of Queen Elizabeth I, the monarch who ruled England with unmatched strength and vision. She was courted by princes, pressured by advisers to marry, yet she chose to remain single. “I am already bound unto a husband,” she declared, “which is the kingdom of England.” In her solitude, she discovered her power, her identity, her purpose. She was not incomplete without a companion; she was complete in her devotion to her calling. Her reign, long and prosperous, stands as a testament to what London describes — that self-knowledge and self-love are the foundations of every strength, whether in life or in love.

To be single, then, is not to be empty, but to be becoming. It is a season of cultivation. The soil of the heart must be tilled before it can nourish another’s growth. In the stillness of solitude, one learns to listen — to the whispers of doubt, to the longings of the spirit, to the quiet voice of truth that is often drowned in the noise of partnership. Those who fear being alone often run into love unprepared, seeking completion in another when they have not yet completed themselves. But those who embrace solitude walk into love not as beggars, but as givers.

London speaks of self-awareness, of the mirror that solitude holds before us. When alone, the masks fall away. There is no one to impress, no one to perform for, no one to blame. It is in such moments that the soul reveals its weaknesses and its wonders. Through reflection, through stillness, through honest self-examination, one grows into wholeness. And when wholeness meets another wholeness, love becomes not a dependence, but a partnership — two souls walking side by side, each strong in their individuality, yet united in shared purpose.

And what of self-love, that sacred flame so many neglect? To love oneself is not vanity, but reverence — the acknowledgment that you are a vessel of divine worth. Without this flame, no relationship can survive, for the one who despises themselves will eventually seek validation from others, draining both hearts. But when one learns to cherish their own spirit, to honor their own boundaries, to forgive their own past, then love flows freely and fearlessly. Self-love is the soil from which all healthy relationships bloom.

So, children of this world, accept your solitude. Do not rush to fill it with noise or faces. Sit with it. Let it teach you, cleanse you, strengthen you. Let it show you what you desire, what you fear, what you are capable of. Build your inner kingdom before you invite another to share it. When you have learned who you are, you will no longer seek love out of need, but out of abundance. You will not cling, but connect. You will not lose yourself, but expand together.

For love is not meant to complete us, but to amplify us. And only those who have stood tall in their solitude can walk boldly in love without losing their balance. Thus, heed Lauren London’s wisdom: embrace your singleness, for it is not the absence of love — it is the training ground of the heart, where the soul learns the sacred art of becoming whole.