Psychotherapy theory turns it all on you: you are the one who is

James Hillman, the depth psychologist who gazed into the soul of culture as well as the soul of man, once declared: “Psychotherapy theory turns it all on you: you are the one who is wrong. If a kid is having trouble or is discouraged, the problem is not just inside the kid; it’s also in the system, the society.” His words are not a rejection of psychology but a piercing revelation—that the struggles of the individual are often the cries of a sickened world. He reminds us that no one suffers in isolation; the soul and the world are woven together like threads of the same cloth.

The meaning here is profound. Too often, psychotherapy theory reduces pain to a private fault. The child who cannot learn is called lazy. The teenager who rebels is labeled broken. The adult who despairs is told the wound is only inside his psyche. But Hillman teaches us that the roots of discouragement reach outward as well as inward. A kid’s sorrow may mirror the failures of schools, the oppression of poverty, or the suffocating weight of cultural expectations. The “wrongness” is not only within the person—it lies also in the system that surrounds them, and the society that shapes them.

History confirms this wisdom. Consider the children of the Industrial Revolution, sent into mines and factories, their small hands blackened by coal, their childhood stolen. Many of these children were crushed not only in body but in spirit, called unruly or defective when they faltered. Yet the truth was not in their weakness, but in the cruelty of the system. It was society, not the child, that was broken. Only when reformers like Charles Dickens and labor activists revealed this truth did change come, and the children were seen not as “wrong” but as victims of injustice.

Another example lies in the struggles of minority children in segregated America. When Black students under Jim Crow laws fell behind, the blame was often placed upon them or their families. But when the Supreme Court in Brown v. Board of Education declared segregation unconstitutional, it illuminated the deeper truth: it was not the children who were at fault, but the system of racial oppression that denied them equal opportunity. Once again, Hillman’s words find their echo: the wound of the child is the wound of the world, and healing requires transformation not just of the individual, but of society itself.

Hillman’s insight is also a call to humility. Too easily do adults and institutions lay blame on the young, saying, “You must fix yourself, you must adjust, you must endure.” But the wise elder sees further. He asks, “What in our homes, our schools, our laws, our cultures has discouraged this child? What poison in our collective spirit has seeped into their heart?” For when we place all responsibility upon the individual, we blind ourselves to the collective shadows we have cast. True healing requires us to see that the soul and the world mirror one another.

The lesson is stern yet filled with hope: never dismiss the struggles of a child, or of any person, as merely private weakness. Look instead to the system—the family, the school, the workplace, the nation. Ask whether it nurtures or corrodes the spirit. Be willing to reform not only the individual but the structures that shape them. For only when both inner and outer wounds are addressed can the soul rise again in strength and dignity.

Practical action lies within reach. Parents, listen deeply to your children and question whether the home itself needs healing. Teachers, recognize that discouragement may come not from the student’s inadequacy but from the failures of the school’s design. Citizens, demand a society that uplifts rather than crushes, that values every child as a seed of possibility. And within yourself, resist the temptation to believe you are solely “wrong.” Instead, ask how the world around you might be reshaped to allow your spirit to flourish.

Thus let Hillman’s words endure: “The problem is not just inside the kid; it’s also in the system, the society.” Carry this truth forward, and you will not only heal individuals but renew the world. For the soul and the world rise and fall together—and to save one is to save the other.