Takers believe in a zero-sum world, and they end up creating one

"Takers believe in a zero-sum world, and they end up creating one where bosses, colleagues, and clients don't trust them. Givers build deeper and broader relationships—people are rooting for them instead of gunning for them." These words, spoken by the wise Adam Grant, reveal a profound truth about human nature and the way we relate to one another in the world. The taker, driven by the belief that there is only so much to go around, seeks to claim as much as possible for themselves, often at the expense of others. They view the world as a battlefield where only a few can win, and everyone else must lose. This belief in a zero-sum world, where one person’s gain is another’s loss, leads them to act with self-interest as their guiding star. But such an approach, though it may bring short-term rewards, creates an environment of mistrust and competition rather than cooperation.

In stark contrast, the giver operates from an entirely different perspective. They understand that the world is not a place of limited resources, but one in which relationships, goodwill, and trust are infinite. The giver believes that by lifting others, they too will rise. In their generosity, they build bonds that go beyond mere transactions; they create deeper and broader relationships that enrich both their lives and the lives of those around them. In the ancient wisdom of the Greeks, there is a saying that "he who sows kindness, reaps friendship." The giver understands that their efforts to serve others are never in vain, for in lifting others up, they elevate themselves.

This truth is exemplified in the life of the great philosopher Socrates, who was not a man driven by the pursuit of wealth or power, but by the pursuit of wisdom. He shared his knowledge freely, guiding others to see the world not through their own narrow lens but through a broader, more interconnected vision. Though he did not seek to accumulate material wealth, Socrates built a legacy that outlasted empires and rulers. His relationships were deep, founded on the principle that true wisdom lies in the sharing of what one knows with others. Socrates embodied the giver’s path, and in doing so, earned the trust and admiration of countless individuals, even in his final moments.

On the other hand, consider the story of the Roman Emperor Nero, whose reign was marked by a hunger for power and a lack of regard for those around him. Nero’s belief in a zero-sum world—where his gain meant the suffering of others—led him to make countless enemies. His acts of cruelty, manipulation, and deceit alienated not only his allies but also his people. In the end, his rule crumbled, and the empire he sought to control fell into chaos. Nero’s story is a cautionary tale of the taker's path—one that leads to isolation, betrayal, and downfall. No matter how high one rises through taking, the foundation of trust is essential for lasting success, and without it, the world becomes an inhospitable place.

McKay’s insight into the giver's path offers a beacon of light in a world often overshadowed by competition and selfishness. The giver does not measure success in terms of what they take, but in the trust, relationships, and connections they foster. When we give, whether in love, time, or service, we lay the groundwork for a world where others are not pitted against us, but instead, they root for us, helping us rise even higher than we could have alone. A person who builds their life around giving is like a tree that shelters those beneath its branches, providing shade, fruit, and protection without asking for anything in return.

In the realm of business, we see this dynamic at play. The most successful entrepreneurs and leaders are often not those who take the most, but those who give the most. Bill Gates, for example, in his later years, shifted his focus from accumulating wealth to giving it away through the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, providing millions with access to healthcare, education, and opportunity. Through his generosity, he has built relationships that extend far beyond his company, creating a network of trust and mutual support that has made him a beloved figure around the world. His story mirrors that of the giver, whose actions ripple outward, transforming the world into a place of greater connection and possibility.

The lesson that we must take from Grant’s wisdom, and from the lives of those who have come before us, is clear: those who take will ultimately find themselves isolated, their success built upon a fragile foundation of self-interest. But those who give, who foster relationships rooted in trust and mutual support, will find that their lives are filled with abundance—not just in material wealth, but in deep, lasting connections. Givers do not just build their own success—they build the success of everyone around them. They create a world where people are not competing against one another, but are rooting for each other, bound together by the invisible threads of generosity and goodwill.

As we walk our own path through life, we must ask ourselves: Are we takers or givers? Are we hoarding what little we believe we have, or are we sharing our gifts and talents with those around us? In our relationships, whether in our work or personal lives, let us remember that the zero-sum world of the taker is a myth—one that only leads to mistrust and alienation. The true path to success, to happiness, and to lasting peace, lies in the generosity of the giver—one who builds not just their own fortunes, but the fortunes of all those around them. Through our giving, we shape a world that is richer, not in gold, but in the bonds of love, respect, and mutual support.