The uncertainty of parenting can bring up feelings in us that

The words of Brené Brown—“The uncertainty of parenting can bring up feelings in us that range from frustration to terror.”—unveil the raw truth of raising children. For to guide a life is to walk a path where no torch fully lights the way. Each parent dreams of certainty: of knowing which decision will keep their child safe, which choice will lead to their happiness, which word will shape their future with wisdom. Yet life denies us such clarity. The shadows of the unknown accompany every parent, and in those shadows dwell fear, doubt, and trembling.

The ancients often spoke of uncertainty as the crucible of courage. The sailor who sets out upon the open sea knows not when storms will strike, yet still he departs. The warrior marching into battle does not know if he will return, yet still he raises his sword. Likewise, the parent, waking each day, does not know what challenges the child will bring, what dangers may arise, or what sorrows may unfold. This is why Brown speaks of frustration to terror—for the spectrum of emotion stretches from the smallest impatience to the deepest dread.

History itself offers us a mirror. Consider the tale of Moses’ mother, Jochebed, who, when Pharaoh decreed death upon the Hebrew sons, placed her infant into a basket upon the Nile. She did not know if the river would consume him or if providence would deliver him. Imagine the terror of that moment, the heart of a mother entrusting her child to uncertainty. Yet from that trembling act arose a leader who would one day deliver his people. Here lies the paradox: from uncertainty, greatness may emerge, though the parent cannot foresee it.

Brené Brown’s words also echo a more modern truth—that fear is not a mark of weakness, but of love. For it is only because the child is cherished that the parent trembles so fiercely at the thought of loss. To feel frustration at the daily struggles, to feel terror at the unknown dangers, is not a sign of failure but of devotion. The parent who feels nothing is not brave, but numb; the parent who admits their fear is one who loves deeply enough to risk vulnerability.

Yet these feelings can weigh heavily. If left untended, frustration can harden into bitterness, and terror can paralyze the heart. The wisdom, then, lies not in denying uncertainty, but in learning to carry it with courage. As the Stoics taught, we cannot control fate, but we can govern our response to it. The parent’s task is not to eliminate uncertainty—it cannot be done—but to walk through it with resilience, leaning on love as both shield and compass.

The lesson is this: embrace your humanity. Do not demand perfection of yourself in a realm where certainty does not exist. Instead, accept that to parent is to walk into mystery, and that fear is the natural companion of love. When frustration arises, breathe deeply and remember that each struggle is temporary. When terror strikes, remind yourself that no parent walks alone—seek the counsel of others, and find strength in community.

Therefore, let your actions be these: speak your fears aloud, so they do not consume you in silence. Share your burdens with those you trust, for even the strongest need allies. Practice presence, for though you cannot control the future, you can offer your child the gift of your attention in the present moment. And above all, love without restraint, for love is the one certainty in the ocean of doubt.

Thus, Brené Brown’s words echo like a timeless hymn: uncertainty will shake you, but love will steady you. Frustration and terror may rise like storms, but they need not sink the ship. Let every generation remember—parenting is not the art of perfect foresight, but of steadfast love amidst the unknown. And in this love, though uncertainty remains, the heart finds its courage.