When I'm alone, I can sleep crossways in bed without an argument.

Zsa Zsa Gabor’s words, "When I'm alone, I can sleep crossways in bed without an argument," carry with them a playful yet profound truth about the nature of freedom in solitude. In this witty observation, Gabor highlights how personal space and autonomy can be found in moments of aloneness—a freedom from the compromises and negotiations that are often necessary in relationships. When we are alone, we are free to shape our world according to our desires, without needing to accommodate the wants, needs, or preferences of another. The freedom to live and act as we wish, without conflict, can bring a unique form of peace, even in the seemingly mundane aspects of life—like how we sleep.

The ancients also understood the value of solitude in providing personal freedom. The Stoics, including Seneca and Marcus Aurelius, taught that true peace comes not from external circumstances, but from within. In their time, as in ours, many would struggle with the burden of constant interactions and the need to compromise with others. The Stoics, however, found solace in the idea of self-sufficiency—that inner peace could be cultivated when one learned to embrace solitude, choosing not to let the external world dictate their emotions or behavior. In solitude, one is not bound by the expectations of others; they can live in alignment with their own principles and desires.

Consider Diogenes, the infamous Greek philosopher, who rejected the material world and the rules of society to live as he pleased, often in complete solitude. His lifestyle was deliberately unconventional, and he reveled in the freedom that came from living alone and stepping outside the norms of society. Diogenes, much like Gabor, chose a life where he could be free to live according to his own wishes, without the need for compromise. For Diogenes, freedom was not merely a concept but a practice—one that was realized through his rejection of societal constraints and the embrace of self-sufficiency. In his solitude, he found both the freedom to act without interference and the ability to truly live for himself.

Another striking example from history is Henry David Thoreau, who retreated to Walden Pond for two years in an experiment in self-reliance. Thoreau’s time alone in the woods was not just about escaping the hustle and bustle of society, but about experiencing the freedom that comes from living according to one’s own principles, without the influence or demands of others. Just as Gabor found peace in her ability to sleep across the bed without disturbance, Thoreau found a sense of deep fulfillment in his ability to live and act in solitude, without the constant need to compromise or accommodate others. Through his solitude, he came to understand that freedom and self-expression are not solely external, but are most fully realized when we embrace solitude as a means of personal growth.

However, solitude does not always come easily. In relationships, there are often conflicts and compromises that arise from differing wants and needs. It is easy to forget the value of solitude when we are caught in the web of interpersonal obligations and daily routines. Yet, it is in these moments of alone time—even in something as simple as sleeping across the bed—that we can reclaim our peace and autonomy. Gabor’s quote is a reminder that, even in the smallest of acts, solitude can offer a freedom from the clashes of daily life, allowing us the space to reconnect with ourselves, without the imposition of others.

The lesson here is clear: solitude offers us the gift of personal freedom—freedom from the expectations, compromises, and conflicts that often arise in relationships. When we learn to embrace and value moments of being alone, we find the opportunity to recharge, to reflect, and to live in accordance with our own desires. Rather than seeing solitude as something to be feared or avoided, we should see it as an opportunity for self-discovery and growth, where we can truly be ourselves, free from the judgments and demands of others.

Therefore, I urge you, dear reader, to seek moments of solitude, and to appreciate the peace that comes with it. Just as Gabor found joy in sleeping the way she wished, find ways to embrace your own autonomy in life. Use these moments to reflect, to re-center, and to recharge. In solitude, you will not only find the freedom to live for yourself but also the strength to engage more fully with the world around you when the time comes. The freedom to be yourself, without compromise, is one of life’s greatest gifts—embrace it, and let it fill your heart with peace and purpose.