Women don't like advice. They don't want you to fix their
Women don't like advice. They don't want you to fix their problems, they just want you to listen.
Hear, O seekers of understanding, the words of Shawn Wayans, who spoke with plain truth about the nature of hearts: “Women don't like advice. They don't want you to fix their problems, they just want you to listen.” These words are not mere jest, but a revelation of the deep currents of human longing. For in the soul’s burdens, it is not always solutions that heal, but companionship, presence, and the quiet strength of being heard.
For too often, men rush to offer advice, wielding words like tools, seeking to mend what is not theirs to repair. Yet many times, a woman asks not for repair, but for recognition—acknowledgment of her struggle, her sorrow, or her joy. To listen is to honor her humanity, to affirm her existence without judgment or correction. The ear, not the tongue, becomes the true gift, and silence can speak louder than all clever answers.
History offers many lessons in this wisdom. Consider the story of Job in the ancient scriptures. When calamity struck him, his friends first came and sat beside him in silence for seven days, saying nothing, for “they saw that his suffering was very great.” In that silence was understanding, in that shared presence was compassion. Yet when they opened their mouths to offer endless advice, to explain his suffering and dictate solutions, they wounded him further. The lesson endures: there is healing in listening, and harm in speech that seeks only to fix.
To listen is no weakness. It is the art of patience, the discipline of humility, the courage to resist the urge to control. It is an act of love greater than any remedy, for it gives not answers but solidarity. By listening, one enters another’s world, bearing witness to their truth without diminishing it. This is what the heart craves—not correction, but communion.
Therefore, pass on this wisdom: when the beloved speaks, open your ear before your mouth, your heart before your judgment. Let your presence be the balm, your attention the offering. For in the act of true listening, one finds not only the path to harmony between man and woman, but also the deeper secret of human connection itself.
QPQuang Pham
There’s some truth to what Shawn Wayans says, but I can’t help but feel like he’s generalizing about women’s preferences. It’s not just women who often want someone to listen rather than give unsolicited advice. Maybe the real takeaway here is that, in general, people appreciate being heard. Still, there are times when advice or problem-solving might be exactly what someone is looking for, so how do we know when to listen and when to help?
TTung
Shawn Wayans’ statement makes me think about how men and women communicate differently at times. While I can see how many women may just want someone to listen, I also wonder—what about when women want to discuss solutions or strategies? Doesn’t this quote make it seem like women are always avoiding advice, when in fact, some might value it more than just listening? Could it be more about the context of the conversation?
MHGameOnline Cai Minh Hieu
This quote makes me reflect on how often we feel the need to fix things rather than just listen. But is it possible that Shawn Wayans is oversimplifying women’s experiences? I know that in my own life, sometimes offering a solution feels like the right thing to do, but other times, just being a good listener is enough. Maybe it all comes down to understanding the specific situation and how the other person is feeling.
THTrinh Van Trung Hieu
I get what Shawn Wayans is saying, but it also feels like there’s a deeper conversation here about emotional support. Listening is important, but shouldn’t there also be space for offering guidance when it’s requested? It’s tricky because sometimes people may say they don’t want advice, but they’re actually seeking reassurance or validation for their thoughts. How do we know when to just listen and when to offer support in the form of advice?
LBLe bo
This quote resonates with me on some level, but I also wonder if it’s a bit too one-sided. It’s true that sometimes people, not just women, want to feel heard, but that doesn’t mean advice is always unwelcome. How can we strike a balance between listening and offering solutions when someone really needs them? Does this quote mean we should never offer advice, or is it more about timing and the need for empathy?