You can't get around pain and opposition, but you can try to be

“You can’t get around pain and opposition, but you can try to be joyful in the trial, and thank yourself for the trial, and thank God for the strength to get through it.” — Thus spoke Mary J. Blige, the songstress of struggle and rebirth, whose voice has carried the weight of sorrow and the light of redemption. In these words, she does not speak as one untouched by hardship, but as one who has wrestled with darkness and found the light that endures within it. Her wisdom, forged in the fire of lived experience, reveals the eternal truth that pain is not the enemy of the soul — it is the teacher, the refiner, the silent sculptor that shapes us into who we are meant to become.

In this quote, Mary J. Blige captures the paradox at the heart of the human journey: that suffering, though inevitable, can become a source of strength and even joy, if we choose to meet it with gratitude instead of despair. She reminds us that no one can avoid the storms of life — pain and opposition are woven into the fabric of existence. Yet within every storm lies a sacred choice: to curse the rain or to dance in it, to fight the darkness or to find the light hidden within it. Her call is not to deny the wound, but to honor it — to say, thank you to the trial, for it brought you wisdom; thank you to yourself, for enduring; and thank you to God, for the strength that carried you through.

The origin of this truth lies in the journey of Blige herself — a woman who rose from the ashes of abuse, addiction, and heartbreak to become a voice of resilience for millions. Her life, like her music, is a testimony to the power of perseverance. In her early years, she faced poverty and trauma; fame brought its own battles of emptiness and self-doubt. Yet through it all, she found a deeper power — not in denying her pain, but in embracing it as part of her growth. Her words come not from theory, but from transformation. They are the prayer of one who has learned that gratitude amid suffering is the highest form of faith, and that joy is not the absence of pain, but the victory of the spirit over it.

This wisdom echoes through history, for every great soul has walked this same narrow road. Consider Nelson Mandela, who spent twenty-seven years imprisoned, unjustly confined by those who feared his light. He did not escape his suffering, nor did he grow bitter. Instead, he emerged from prison not with hatred, but with forgiveness. When asked how he endured, he said, “I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it.” Like Mary J. Blige, Mandela found strength in the trial, giving thanks for the endurance it forged within him. His suffering became his sanctification, his pain the seed of his nation’s healing.

In this way, Blige’s quote becomes a map for every weary traveler of the soul. When she says to “thank yourself for the trial,” she speaks of honoring the self that did not give up, the self that kept walking even when hope seemed lost. It is a call to self-compassion — to acknowledge that survival is not weakness, but triumph. And when she says to “thank God for the strength to get through it,” she points to the eternal partnership between human perseverance and divine grace. For while our own hands must bear the weight of the burden, it is God who gives the shoulders their strength.

To find joy in the trial is not to pretend that pain is pleasant, but to recognize that every struggle carries hidden treasure. The fire refines gold, and the storm teaches the tree to root deeper. So too, every wound deepens the soul’s capacity for compassion and courage. When life presses upon you with suffering, remember that pressure creates diamonds, and resistance gives birth to power. The heart that remains grateful through pain will one day look back and see that what seemed destruction was in truth transformation — that grace was walking beside you all along, unseen but unwavering.

Therefore, my children, take this teaching into your hearts: do not flee from your trials, for they are sacred teachers. When pain comes, greet it with courage; when sorrow speaks, listen for wisdom; when opposition rises, answer it with steadfast joy. Give thanks to yourself for your endurance — for you have walked through fire and still breathe light. And give thanks to God, for every breath of strength is His mercy made visible.

For in truth, there is no crown without the cross, no victory without the battle, no song of triumph without the tears that birthed it. Walk through your trials with gratitude, as Mary J. Blige has sung with her life — and you will find that even in the deepest darkness, joy is possible, faith is powerful, and the grace of God is enough to carry you through every storm.