You have to fight for your marriage, do whatever it takes. The
You have to fight for your marriage, do whatever it takes. The commitment has to be there. And if you don't have a sense of humor, I don't know how anybody makes it.
In the steadfast and heartfelt words of Kay Robertson, matriarch of faith and family, we hear the voice of one who has walked long upon the path of love: “You have to fight for your marriage, do whatever it takes. The commitment has to be there. And if you don't have a sense of humor, I don't know how anybody makes it.” These are not the idle musings of romance, but the tempered wisdom of endurance — the truth that love, though divine in spark, must be forged by will. Her words remind us that marriage, like any sacred bond, is not preserved by mere affection, but by courage, perseverance, and the saving grace of laughter.
The origin of this quote arises from Kay Robertson’s own journey — decades of marriage marked by faith, struggle, forgiveness, and triumph. As the matriarch of the Robertson family, known to many through Duck Dynasty, she has seen the storms and calms of a lifelong partnership. Her counsel is born not from theory, but from living — from the daily act of choosing love even when feeling fails, of tending a fire that time and trial might seek to extinguish. Her words echo the ageless wisdom of the ancients: that the bonds between two souls are not sustained by passion alone, but by the discipline of devotion.
The ancients revered marriage as a covenant of the spirit — not merely a contract of comfort or pleasure, but a union of purpose. The philosophers of Greece called it a partnership of virtue, where each strengthens the other in the pursuit of the good. Yet even they knew that no mortal bond endures without testing. Commitment, as Kay declares, is the foundation — the unshakable vow that when the road grows rough, one does not flee but stands firm. To “fight for your marriage” is not to battle your partner, but to battle the worldly forces that would divide you — pride, weariness, resentment, and neglect.
Consider the story of Odysseus and Penelope, who were parted for twenty years by war and hardship. While Odysseus fought to return home, Penelope fought in her own way — resisting suitors, holding faith, weaving by day and unweaving by night. Their love endured not through ease, but through perseverance and faithfulness. So too does Kay’s teaching reflect that ancient truth: that love is not proven in comfort, but in conflict; not in the absence of struggle, but in the choice to continue despite it. Marriage, she reminds us, is not a resting place — it is a pilgrimage.
Yet Robertson adds a vital truth, one that gives her wisdom its light: “If you don’t have a sense of humor, I don’t know how anybody makes it.” For without humor, the heart grows hard; without laughter, love loses its grace. The ancients knew that joy is not a luxury, but a sustainer of the soul. Laughter is the breath that revives the weary spirit, the balm that softens misunderstanding, the thread that stitches two hearts back together after anger has torn them apart. In every enduring marriage, there must be moments when tears give way to smiles, when frustration dissolves into shared amusement at one’s own foolishness. Humor does not erase pain — it redeems it.
In her words lies also a warning for our time, when the world often treats love as fleeting and disposable. Too many enter marriage expecting ease, but abandon it at the first shadow of difficulty. Kay’s wisdom calls us back to the ancient discipline of covenant — to do “whatever it takes,” to stand by one another through sickness and disappointment, to remember that love is not a feeling to chase, but a promise to keep. And within that promise, humor is not weakness, but strength — the strength to see the absurdity of our own egos, to forgive quickly, to remember joy even amid the struggle.
So, my child of tomorrow, take this lesson to heart: love must be fought for, not in anger, but in faith. Let your commitment be your armor and your laughter your shield. When the storms of life shake your home, remember that your vows were not spoken for fair weather alone. Speak gently, forgive swiftly, and above all, laugh together — for laughter keeps the soul supple and the heart light. It reminds you that beneath every argument and every tear is the same beloved face you first chose, and must choose again, every day.
For in the end, this is the secret Kay Robertson passes down: that commitment gives love its strength, and humor gives it its life. Together, they form a union unbreakable — a partnership not merely of two bodies, but of two spirits walking hand in hand through joy, through sorrow, through time itself. And when laughter still echoes in your home after many years, you will know that you, too, have kept the covenant of love.
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