Norm Crosby

Here is a biographical sketch and collection of quotes about Norm Crosby — the American comedian noted for his wordplay and malapropisms:

Norm Crosby – Life, Career, and Memorable Quotes

Learn about Norm Crosby — “The Master of Malaprop” — his rise as a comedian, his signature style, and the funniest, wittiest quotes that reflect his voice.

Introduction

Norman Lawrence “Norm” Crosby (born September 15, 1927 – died November 7, 2020) was an American comedian whose trademark was the use of malapropisms (mistaken word substitutions), delivered with a genial, affable style. He became a beloved figure in stand-up, television, and live performance, earning the nickname “The Master of Malaprop.”

Despite physical challenges including hearing loss, Crosby remained active and visible, using humor to address those challenges as well.

Early Life and Personal Background

• Birth & family. Crosby was born in Boston, Massachusetts, and raised in the Dorchester neighborhood.

• Hearing damage / wartime service. During World War II, Crosby served on a U.S. Coast Guard submarine chaser in the North Atlantic. He sustained permanent hearing damage due to concussion from depth charges.

• Marriage & family. In 1966, he married Joan Crane Foley. They had two children.

• Freemasonry and charitable work. He was active in Freemasonry (became a Master in at least one lodge) and participated in various charitable activities.

Crosby passed away on November 7, 2020, at his home in Los Angeles, of heart failure, at age 93.

Career and Comedic Style

Stand-up beginnings & persona

Crosby emerged in the 1950s as a solo stand-up comedian. He cultivated a “blue-collar, guy-next-door” persona, which made him broadly relatable.

His signature technique was sprinkling malapropisms into his routines—deliberately misusing words in humorous ways (e.g. swapping similar-sounding words). Because of this, he was often referred to as the Master of Malaprop.

Television & hosting

• He made his first appearance on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson in December 1964.

• In 1968, he co-starred on The Beautiful Phyllis Diller Show.

• From 1974, he co-hosted the variety series Everything Goes.

• From 1978 to 1981, he hosted The Comedy Shop, a syndicated show featuring both new and established comics.

• He was a regular co-host of the Jerry Lewis MDA Labor Day Telethon, from 1983 until the show’s dissociation from Lewis in 2010.

Film & later appearances

He appeared in a few films, sometimes lending his voice. Notably, he was in Eight Crazy Nights (2002) and Grown Ups 2 (2013).

Crosby also had a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame (6560 Hollywood Boulevard).

Legacy and Influence

Norm Crosby is remembered for:

• Popularizing malapropisms in comedy. His witty misuse of words became his hallmark and influenced how wordplay could be used in stand-up.

• Warm, accessible style. He maintained a persona that bridged everyman sensibilities and clever humor.

• Advocacy around hearing loss. Given his own hearing impairment, he spoke openly about aids and awareness.

• Longevity & adaptability. He remained active across decades and in various formats (stage, television, film).

Though not always in the mainstream spotlight, he holds a special place in American comedic tradition for his wordplay, gentle persona, and consistency.

Memorable Quotes by Norm Crosby

Here are several of his funniest and most characteristic quotes:

“When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty.”

“Old is when people compliment your alligator shoes, and you’re not wearing any.”

“A handicap is only if you let it be a handicap.”

“I don’t do the same show twice. I’ve never done a show word for word.”

“I think it is – the biggest plus the performer can have is to be a little unique.”

“If your eyes hurt after you drink coffee, you have to take the spoon out of the cup.”

“My school was so tough the school newspaper had an obituary section.”

“All’s fair if you have a really good attorney.”

These quotes reflect his core comedic tools — puns, misdirection, and a folksy frame that makes the absurd feel conversational.

Lessons from Norm Crosby

1. Wordplay endures. Even with minimal props or visuals, clever language can carry an entire comedic persona.

2. Embrace your quirks. Crosby turned his hearing loss and “flaws” into parts of his public narrative, not liabilities.

3. Authenticity matters. His persona never felt forced; it was consistent, warm, and accessible.

4. Don’t repeat yourself. He intentionally avoided repeating shows verbatim, keeping material fresh.

5. Humor is connection. His jokes were often about everyday situations, making them easy for audiences to relate to.