Richard Armour

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Richard Armour – Life, Career, and Famous Quotations


Learn about Richard Armour (1906–1989), the American poet known for his whimsical light verse, parody, and academic satire. Explore his life, works, style, and memorable lines.

Introduction

Richard Willard Armour was an American poet, writer, and satirist whose witty and playful verse delighted readers over decades. Born July 15, 1906, and passing on February 28, 1989, he authored over sixty books and thousands of poems. His humorous style often led to misattribution to Ogden Nash, but Armour carved out his own voice through parody, wordplay, and a dual identity as both scholar and jester.

Early Life & Education

Richard Armour was born in San Pedro, Los Angeles, California, the only child of Harry W. Armour and Sue Wheelock Armour. His father operated a drugstore, which inspired some of Armour’s later reflections in Drug Store Days.

He grew up partly in Pomona, California, and attended Pomona College. Harvard University, where he studied English philology and worked with prominent scholars, ultimately earning a Ph.D.

His doctoral work and early scholarship was more serious in tone, including a 1935 biography of the English poet Bryan Waller Procter and work co-editing Coleridge the Talker in 1940.

Career & Major Works

Academic & Teaching Life

After completing his academic training, Armour went into the academic fold. He became a Professor of English at Scripps College in Claremont, California, and also taught at Claremont Graduate School.

His academic and poet identities coexisted: he often wore “two costumes,” that of the scholar and of the jester.

Light Verse & Satire

Armour is best known for his light verse, humorous poems, parodies, and satirical books.

He published columns (notably Armour’s Armory) in Sunday newspaper supplements, contributing witty quatrains and humorous observations.

Many of his humorous poems have been misattributed over the years to Ogden Nash, reflecting the similar tone in playful verse.

Some of his popular quatrains:

“Shake and shake / the catsup bottle / none will come / and then a lot’ll.” “Nothing attracts / the mustard from wieners / as much as the slacks / just back from the cleaners.”

He also produced parody histories such as It All Started with Columbus, It All Started with Europa, It All Started with Marx, Twisted Tales from Shakespeare, and more. These works often mimic academic conventions—footnotes, glossaries, humorously skewed facts—and play with the reader’s expectations.

His memoir Drug Store Days recounts his youth among pills and potions, remembering his early life and the world of his father’s drugstore.

Prolific Output

Over his lifetime, Armour published more than 65 books and contributed to over 200 magazines across the U.S. and the UK.

By the time of his death, he had produced over 10,000 poems and humorous pieces.

He appeared in popular media too—for example, in 1957 he appeared on the television game show You Bet Your Life, hosting by Groucho Marx, where he recited humorous poems live.

Style, Themes & Influence

Armour’s poetic style is marked by lightness, wordplay, wit, parody, and friendly satire. His poems seldom tackle heavy existential or philosophical themes directly; rather, they enjoy twisting the ordinary, poking fun at human foibles, and satire of academic life.

He delighted in literal absurdity and everyday paradoxes, making simple observations feel whimsical. His use of rhyme, meter, and pun is gentle and playful.

Because his style resembled that of Nash, many of his lines circulated anonymously or misattributed — but Armour’s consistent voice, especially in parody and longer works, is distinct.

His parodic histories mock the conventions of serious scholarship, reducing grand narratives to silly or inverted versions, reminding readers not to take all authority too seriously.

Later Life & Death

In his later years, Armour battled Parkinson’s disease, which limited his writing.

He died February 28, 1989, at age 82, in a convalescent home in Claremont, east of Los Angeles.

At his passing, obituaries celebrated him as a poet, satirist, and teacher who “delighted generations.”

Selected Quotes & Verses

Here are appreciable snippets and lines from Armour’s humorous verse:

  • “Shake and shake / the catsup bottle / none will come / and then a lot’ll.”

  • “Nothing attracts / the mustard from wieners / as much as the slacks / just back from the cleaners.”

  • A playful poem he recited to Groucho Marx (on You Bet Your Life):

    “Most poets write of Meadowlarks / I sing instead of Groucho Marx / His lustrous eyes … His many charms … / In short … A man to keep your wife away from.”
    — (excerpt)

These show his fondness for light rhyme, playful turns, and affectionate mockery.

Legacy & Lessons

Legacy

  • Richard Armour remains a celebrated figure in American light verse and humorous poetry.

  • His work opened the door for academics to engage in fun, showing that serious scholars can also be charming jesters.

  • Lines of his circulate widely (sometimes anonymously), embedding him in popular culture albeit sometimes invisibly.

  • His parody books offer a meta-commentary on the nature of history, scholarship, and authority.

Lessons

  1. Humor has intellectual value
    Armour demonstrates that laughter and wit can be vehicles for insight, critique, and human connection.

  2. Don’t be boxed by your profession
    He was simultaneously an English professor and a whimsy poet — a reminder that identity can have breadth.

  3. Playfulness invites reexamination
    His parodies ask us: how seriously do we take our truths and the conventions underpinning knowledge?

  4. Consistency builds legacy
    Through decades of output, recurring style, and public presence, even light verse can leave an enduring footprint.