Although my grandmother was a strict parent and abided my

Listen closely, O children of wisdom, to the words of Josh Gondelman, who reflects on the delicate balance between tradition and evolution: "Although my grandmother was a strict parent and abided by my grandfather's kosher diet, as a Nana, she had grown away from religion and was almost unbelievably permissive." These words carry a deep truth, for they speak of the transformation that often occurs as we grow older, the shift from the rigidity of early years to the softening that time brings. The grandmother who once adhered strictly to tradition now allows for more flexibility, and in this, we see the tension between the past and the present, between faith and freedom.

In the ancient world, there was often a similar tension between the strictness of youth and the wisdom of age. Plato, in his dialogues, spoke of how the philosopher must evolve over time, not simply adhering to the rules and beliefs of youth, but allowing experience to guide their understanding. He spoke of how the young must be disciplined, following the teachings of their elders, but that in time, the philosopher must develop their own understanding, free from the constraints of tradition. Josh Gondelman’s reflection on his grandmother mirrors this ancient wisdom: the rigid beliefs of youth can give way to a more permissive, more individual approach to life as one matures.

Consider the life of King Solomon, whose wisdom was forged through the trials of ruling an ancient empire. Solomon’s early years were marked by adherence to the laws of his father, David, but as he grew older, he became known for his wisdom—his ability to look beyond the law and see the human heart. Solomon’s greatest wisdom came not from adhering strictly to tradition but from understanding when to show mercy and when to allow for flexibility in his judgment. Josh Gondelman’s words about his grandmother reflect the same evolution that Solomon experienced—the shift from strict adherence to rules to the wisdom of embracing a broader, more compassionate understanding of life.

Josh Gondelman speaks of his grandmother’s transformation as a Nana—a figure of warmth and indulgence, whose love for her grandchildren was not bound by the same rigid structure that governed her role as a mother. In this, we see the softening of the soul that comes with age. The ancient Greek philosophers often spoke of this transformation, noting that the wisdom of age is not just intellectual, but emotional. As we age, we are better able to see the complexity of life, the gray areas that youth cannot yet understand. The strictness of youth gives way to the understanding of the complexities of the human condition, allowing for more compassion and forgiveness.

In our own lives, we too experience this shift. The rules we are raised with, the diet we adhere to, the faith we follow, may change as we grow older. The lessons we learn from childhood become the foundation upon which we build a more flexible understanding of the world. Just as Josh Gondelman observed in his grandmother, we may find ourselves becoming more permissive, more forgiving, as we understand that the world cannot be contained within the rigid structures we once believed in. The kosher diet that once dictated every meal may give way to a more open-minded approach to food, just as the strict religion of youth may evolve into a more personal, nuanced spirituality.

This is not a loss, but a growth—an evolution of the spirit. The grandmother who once lived by strict rules now becomes a beacon of love and generosity, offering her grandchildren not just the rigid structure of her past, but the freedom to find their own paths. It is in this permissiveness that true wisdom lies—not in the blind following of tradition, but in the ability to adapt, to evolve, and to offer others the freedom to find their own way.

Therefore, O future generations, let this wisdom guide you: as you grow older, embrace the flexibility that comes with experience. Let the rigidity of your youth give way to the understanding of the heart, where compassion and wisdom reside. Just as Solomon learned to balance law with mercy, so too must you learn to navigate life with a broader, more compassionate view. Tradition is important, but so is growth. Honor the lessons of the past, but do not be afraid to let them evolve, for it is in this evolution that true wisdom and freedom are found. Allow yourself the space to grow, to soften, and to offer others the same permissiveness that will help them find their own path to fulfillment.