Family politics are worse than world politics. That's all I can

Host: The living room was cozy, the quiet hum of the world outside barely audible through the window. Inside, the space felt warm and inviting, yet there was an underlying tension that hung in the air, as if a deeper conversation was waiting to unfold. Jack sat on the couch, his gaze focused but distant, while Jeeny sat nearby, her tea resting in her hands, her attention on him, sensing the shift in the mood.

Jeeny: (breaking the silence, her voice calm but thoughtful) “You know, Michael Cimino once said, ‘Family politics are worse than world politics. That’s all I can say. You don’t get to choose your family; you get to choose your friends. Your family is imposed upon you.’”

(She looked at Jack, her voice gentle yet probing.) “What do you think he meant by that? About family politics being more challenging than world politics?”

Jack: (pausing, his voice thoughtful as he considered the words) “I think he’s pointing to the complexity and emotional intensity that comes with family. In a family, you’re bound together by blood, by history, by circumstances that are often beyond your control. You can’t choose the people you’re related to, and that lack of choice can make family dynamics complicated — sometimes messy and difficult to navigate.”

Jeeny: (nodding slowly, her voice steady and full of insight) “Exactly. With friends, we have the luxury of choice. We pick the people we connect with, the ones who bring out the best in us. But with family, you don’t get that option. You’re often thrown together with people who have different backgrounds, different values, and you have to figure out how to coexist, even when those differences lead to conflict.”

Jack: (smiling faintly, his voice almost reflective) “It’s true. Family dynamics are often less about compatibility and more about survival. You’re tied to each other, for better or worse, and that can create tensions that are hard to resolve. It’s like there’s no easy way out — you can walk away from a friendship if it becomes too much, but with family, the connection is still there, whether you like it or not.”

Jeeny: (gently, her voice filled with understanding) “Yes, and because those relationships are often so deeply rooted, they can bring out emotions and conflicts that you wouldn’t necessarily face in other relationships. Family can be a source of immense love and support, but it can also be a source of hurt and frustration, because there’s a history that you can’t escape.”

Jack: (thoughtfully, his voice softer now) “And there’s an expectation that family should always get along, that it should be a safe place. But the reality is, families are human too. They’re filled with the same flaws, misunderstandings, and struggles that any group of people would have. That’s why family politics can feel so much more complicated — you’re not just dealing with differing opinions, you’re dealing with history, with years of shared experiences, and sometimes unresolved tensions.”

Jeeny: (smiling gently, her voice calm) “It’s a lot to navigate. But I think Cimino’s point is that even though we may not get to choose our family, we can choose how we respond to them. We can set boundaries, we can decide how much emotional energy we’re willing to invest in those relationships, and how we want to deal with the conflict when it arises.”

Jack: (nodding, a sense of understanding in his voice) “Exactly. Family isn’t always something you can control, but your reaction to it is. And by accepting the challenges of family dynamics, we can find a way to navigate them with more awareness and peace.”

Host: The room felt quieter now, the weight of Cimino’s words settling between them like a shared realization. Family politics, with all their complexity and emotional weight, were often more difficult to navigate than any external political struggle. But the understanding that we can choose how to respond, how to manage those relationships, offered a sense of peace. Jack and Jeeny sat in that realization, knowing that while family dynamics were often unpredictable, our ability to navigate them was within our control.

Jack: (softly, with a sense of calm) “I think that’s the key — knowing that we can control how we respond. We don’t always get to choose our family, but we can choose to approach it with more understanding and boundaries.”

Jeeny: (smiling warmly) “Exactly. And in that, we can find the peace we need, even within the complexities of family dynamics.”

Host: The night had fully settled in outside, but inside, there was a quiet sense of clarity. Family, though not always easy, was a part of our lives that we couldn’t escape, but how we chose to deal with it — how we responded to the conflicts and challenges — was where we found our strength. In that understanding, there was both freedom and peace.