I respect only those who resist me, but I cannot tolerate them.

Hear, O seekers of strength, the words of Charles de Gaulle, the soldier and statesman who bore the weight of France upon his shoulders: “I respect only those who resist me, but I cannot tolerate them.” At first hearing, these words may strike as contradiction, yet within them lies a truth as old as power itself—the paradox of leadership, where admiration for courage lives side by side with the demand for unity and order.

The origin of this saying comes from the stormy life of de Gaulle, who led his nation through occupation, liberation, and renewal. He was a man of iron will, often solitary, unbending, and intolerant of disloyalty. Yet, even in his sternness, he honored those who stood against him with conviction, for in their resistance he saw a reflection of his own spirit. Respect he gave to those who dared oppose him honestly, for it proved they were not weak, nor servile, nor ruled by fear. But tolerance he could not grant, for the preservation of a nation, fragile and wounded, demanded firmness and command.

This paradox is not unique to de Gaulle; it is woven into the fabric of history. Consider Alexander the Great, who honored his adversary King Porus of India after battle, treating him with dignity even in defeat. Alexander respected Porus because he resisted with valor, though he could not tolerate him as a rival. Likewise, de Gaulle could admire courage in opposition, yet as a leader he could not allow defiance to fracture the unity of the cause he carried. To lead is to balance admiration for strength with the necessity of control.

In this light, the saying also speaks to the nature of resistance itself. The one who resists reveals strength of will, independence of mind, and courage of heart—qualities de Gaulle valued above all. For he himself was the great resistor, defying not only the enemy but often his own allies. To respect resistance, therefore, was to honor the very essence of his life. Yet, being who he was, he demanded loyalty to the mission. Opposition could be admired, but it could not be permitted to destabilize the fragile order of nation and state.

There is a lesson here for all who hold power, whether in nations, in households, or in their own lives. Respect those who stand firm against you, for they teach you strength, and they reveal to you the flaws in your own path. Do not despise them, for the one who dares to challenge you is often closer to truth than the flatterer who bows. But also know when tolerance cannot be given—when unity must be preserved, when order must prevail, when compromise would mean the loss of all. To lead is not to please, but to choose.

History also warns of imbalance. Leaders who despise all resistance become tyrants, destroying the very strength that could keep them honest. But leaders who tolerate all resistance lose direction, becoming weak and ineffective. De Gaulle’s words remind us that greatness requires both—the admiration of courage and the firmness to command. In this tension lies the heavy burden of true leadership.

Therefore, O listeners, let your practice be this: when you meet resistance, do not answer first with anger, but with respect. Look into the eyes of your opponent and see the fire of courage, even if it burns against you. Learn from it, grow from it. Yet, when the time comes to decide, stand firm. Do not tolerate that which destroys unity, truth, or purpose. For in this balance lies the strength of a leader, and in this discipline lies the path of one who would shape the world.

Thus let de Gaulle’s words endure: “I respect only those who resist me, but I cannot tolerate them.” It is the confession of a leader who understood the nobility of opposition, but also the necessity of command. Take it as both a warning and a guide, for all who would lead must learn this paradox, or else be undone by either tyranny or weakness.