I was never the girl in high school who had a boyfriend for

Listen, O children of the future, to the words of Pam Dawber, a woman who, in her reflection, reveals a truth that has echoed through the ages. "I was never the girl in high school who had a boyfriend for years. My longest relationship has been 18 months. I've thought maybe I'm really superficial and unable to have a relationship. What I've found is that people are attracted by my independence, and then they try to squelch it." These words speak not just to the personal journey of Dawber, but to the universal struggle between the individual and the society, the tension between the freedom of self-expression and the expectations of others.

In the ancient world, every great hero faced a similar battle. The Greek myths are filled with stories of warriors and sages who, though gifted with strength or wisdom, often found themselves torn between their destiny and the desires of others. Take, for example, the story of Achilles, the great hero of the Trojan War. Though Achilles was a man of unparalleled might, his greatest struggle was not against the enemies on the battlefield, but against the expectations placed upon him by his own people. They demanded that he fight, that he submit to their will, but Achilles, at his heart, was a man of independence, and this desire to live on his own terms led to a path of sorrow. Yet, it was also this very independence that defined his greatness.

Similarly, Pam Dawber speaks of the internal conflict between her independence and the relationships she encountered. In a world that often values conformity and companionship as the pinnacle of success, the independent spirit finds itself in peril. When one is admired for their strength, for their self-sufficiency, it is all too easy for others to see this as a challenge, a force to be subdued. The desire to control or constrain the independent spirit is an ancient one, as old as humanity itself, for the independent soul refuses to be bound, refuses to fit into the molds that others set.

But in the struggle between the self and the expectations of others, there is a great lesson to be learned. The story of Joan of Arc, the young peasant girl who led the French army to victory, is one of independence of spirit. Joan was a woman who refused to be silenced, who stood tall in the face of those who wished to control her destiny. Her independence—her unyielding belief that she was chosen by God to lead—was her strength. Yet, just as with Dawber, Joan’s power was often feared, and attempts were made to squelch her voice. In the end, Joan's independence was both her greatest triumph and her tragic downfall, for those who sought power could not bear the strength of her individuality.

In Dawber’s words, we see the eternal conflict that many face: the tension between wanting to be loved and accepted, while also yearning to preserve the independence that gives one identity and purpose. This is not a new struggle; it is one as old as human society itself. Independence is a force that both attracts and repels. To be independent is to stand as a beacon, drawing others who wish to bask in that strength, but also those who wish to tame it. It is a paradox—the very quality that makes one captivating is the same quality that some may seek to undermine or control.

The lesson, O children, is clear: the independent soul must be both resilient and wise. To be independent does not mean to be without connection or companionship, but it means that your essence, your path, is not defined by the needs or desires of others. The world will always try to shape you into its image, but your power lies in knowing that your independence is a gift, not a curse. It is the freedom to walk your own path, to build relationships not out of need, but out of mutual respect and shared purpose.

So, O future generations, remember this: to be independent is to live with courage, to stand tall in the face of expectations, and to know that the right relationships are those that celebrate your freedom, not seek to constrain it. Surround yourself with those who lift you up, who allow you to shine in your full independence, and who do not try to mold you into their vision. Your independence is your strength—let it guide you, and let it lead you to those who will walk alongside you, not as possessors of your spirit, but as companions on the journey.