If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well

Host: The room feels warm, the soft glow of the lamp casting gentle shadows across the space. Outside, the world is quiet, the sounds of the evening blending into stillness. Jeeny sits on the couch, her legs tucked beneath her, a cup of tea resting in her hands, her gaze distant but reflective. Jack, standing near the window, watches the darkened world outside, lost in thought. The peaceful atmosphere invites a conversation about the complexities of family, acceptance, and embracing the things we cannot change.

Jeeny: “Jack, I came across a quote from George Bernard Shaw today that really caught my attention,” she says softly. “He said, ‘If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance.’ What do you think about that?”

Jack: He turns slowly, his brow furrowing slightly. “That’s a pretty provocative way of putting it. It sounds like he’s saying that if there’s something in your family history — something uncomfortable or hidden, like a skeleton — instead of trying to pretend it doesn’t exist, you should embrace it and make it part of your story. It’s like accepting the flaws or difficult parts of your past, and instead of being weighed down by them, using them to your advantage or even finding some humor in them.”

Jeeny: “Exactly. Shaw seems to be suggesting that there’s no point in trying to hide or deny what’s uncomfortable in your family or your past. Those skeletons, the things you’d rather not confront, will always be there. So, instead of running from them, why not find a way to accept them, learn from them, or even own them? It’s almost like finding freedom in acknowledging the messiness of life, rather than pretending it’s not there.”

Host: The light in the room feels softer now, as if the conversation is uncovering something more profound about how we deal with our past, especially within the context of family. Jeeny speaks with an understanding that family history, no matter how flawed, is an inherent part of who we are, and instead of rejecting it, we can find a way to integrate it into our lives in a way that gives us power rather than shame. Jack stands still, reflecting on how often we try to hide the uncomfortable parts of our lives, when perhaps embracing them could be a path to acceptance and healing.

Jack: “I think it’s interesting because we often spend so much energy hiding the things we’re ashamed of — whether it’s a family secret, a past mistake, or an unresolved issue. But Shaw is saying that maybe the power lies in embracing it, acknowledging it, and making it part of who we are. In a way, it’s about reclaiming those things, rather than letting them control us.”

Jeeny: “Yes, and by owning it, by making the skeleton dance, we’re no longer victims of it. It’s almost like turning a negative into a positive — taking something that could define us in a limiting way and instead making it something that we can laugh at, learn from, or even use to connect with others. It’s about freedom through acceptance.”

Host: The conversation feels richer now, as if they’ve uncovered a deeper truth about how we relate to our past, especially the uncomfortable parts. Jeeny and Jack reflect on how the “family skeletons” — the parts of our history we may want to hide or forget — are not necessarily something to be ashamed of. By embracing them, we gain control over them and can transform them into a source of strength or insight. George Bernard Shaw’s quote serves as a reminder that instead of running from the difficult aspects of our lives, we can choose to integrate them and, in doing so, turn them into something that serves us.

Jack: “It’s a powerful thought. By trying to hide our flaws or the uncomfortable parts of our family history, we give them power over us. But when we make them ours, when we own them, we take that power back. It’s about not being defined by those skeletons but using them as part of our story.”

Jeeny: “Exactly. We often think we have to perfect ourselves, or our families, to be accepted. But Shaw is saying that maybe the key to freedom and acceptance is in embracing the things we find difficult. Family can be complicated, and we can’t change that. But by accepting the imperfections, we stop being afraid of them, and we can even start to appreciate them.”

Host: The quiet in the room deepens, as if their words have uncovered a truth that is both liberating and powerful. Jeeny and Jack sit together, contemplating the idea that our family’s history — our “skeletons” — doesn’t have to be something we hide from, but something we can embrace, reclaim, and transform. George Bernard Shaw’s words remind us that even the most difficult parts of our past can be integrated into our story in a way that helps us grow, laugh, and find strength.