It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to do it is

When Johnny Vegas said, “It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to do it is another question altogether,” he spoke with the voice of a man who understands the deep human struggle between self-love and self-doubt. His words are not mere jest; they reveal the profound complexities of identity, self-worth, and the roles that society places upon individuals — especially women. Vegas, known for his candid humor, uses this sharp observation to unmask the hidden truths that lie beneath the surface of self-perception. In his jest, he brings forth the question: why is it easy for some to love themselves, yet so difficult for others, particularly women, to do so?

At the heart of his quote lies a universal struggle — the battle between the self and the external gaze. To love oneself is a noble act, yet in a world that often demands conformity, perfection, and validation from others, this love becomes a challenge. For women, the pressure is especially intense. Society has long dictated that a woman’s worth is tied to her appearance, her relationships, and her ability to please others. This external standard creates a fog through which it becomes difficult to see oneself clearly, to value oneself as a whole and unique being, independent of external approval.

In the ancient world, this struggle was not new. Women, from Cleopatra to Sappho, were often judged not for their intellect or strength, but for their beauty and their roles in relation to men. Yet, despite the burdens placed upon them, there were those who defied the world’s gaze. Sappho, the great poet, spoke of the beauty of the soul, not simply the body. She crafted verses that celebrated the individual spirit, pushing against the limits that society had set for women. Though Sappho’s life was filled with love and loss, she knew that true beauty lies in the love one has for oneself — a lesson that transcends time and culture.

Even in more recent history, we see the stories of women who struggled, yet prevailed in finding their own self-worth. Take, for example, the legendary Frida Kahlo, who painted not just the images of herself but also the pain of her body, the brokenness of her spirit, and the beauty in her imperfection. Kahlo’s art was not just a reflection of how the world saw her; it was a declaration of how she saw herself — fierce, unyielding, and unapologetically human. Yet, even she faced the doubts that come from living in a world that seeks to diminish the inner light of women, telling them that their worth is defined by everything except their essence.

The meaning of Johnny Vegas’ words, then, is not simply about the ease or difficulty of loving oneself; it is about the external forces that seek to dictate how we view ourselves. For women, this pressure is compounded by the constant comparison to societal standards that are both superficial and unattainable. The lesson here is twofold: first, that the struggle to love oneself is universal, and second, that it is not a weakness but a sacred fight to reclaim one’s worth in the face of overwhelming opposition.

In the modern world, social media magnifies this struggle. Every woman is bombarded with images of idealized beauty, perfection, and success, which can easily distort self-image and breed insecurity. The quote by Johnny Vegas calls attention to this modern malady: the external pressure that makes self-love feel like an act of rebellion. But in reality, it is the most essential act — for self-love is not vanity; it is the foundation of strength, resilience, and peace. Without it, we cannot fully engage with the world, for we will always look to others for validation rather than cultivating our own sense of worth.

The lesson, then, is to return to the truth of one’s own essence. To love oneself is not an act of arrogance, but of courage. It requires the ability to see oneself beyond the external gaze, to strip away the layers of expectation that cloud our vision. It is about embracing all that you are — your imperfections, your scars, your dreams, and your strength. For those who struggle to love themselves, it is important to remember: self-love is not earned by fulfilling the world’s standards; it is born from recognizing the sacred light within.

Practical actions for the soul seeking self-love:

1. Refuse comparison. Do not measure your worth by the standards of others, for you are an original, not a copy.

2. Cultivate your inner voice. Spend time in solitude, listen to your heart, and let your own thoughts guide you to the truth of who you are.

3. Celebrate your uniqueness. Whether through art, expression, or simple acts of kindness, acknowledge the beauty of your individuality.

4. Let go of external validation. Seek not the approval of the world, but the peace that comes from knowing you are enough — as you are.

For as Johnny Vegas so wittingly reminds us, to love oneself in a world that asks for perfection is no small feat. Yet, it is in that very struggle that we find our greatest power — to stand proudly in our truth, and to love ourselves not because the world says we should, but because we are worthy of it. True love begins within, and when we love ourselves fully, we offer that love freely to the world.