It's really hard coming of age in today's society, where society

In the dawning days of human civilization, the journey of a young person was marked by time-honored rites of passage, clear paths from childhood to adulthood, and ample time to grow, learn, and explore one’s place in the world. But in the modern world, Rooney Mara speaks a truth that resonates deeply in the hearts of many: "It's really hard coming of age in today's society, where society wants you to make the decision of what you want to do with your life by the time you're 16 years old. Most kids don't know what they want to do. How could they? They haven't lived in the real world yet." This insight reveals a profound tension between the expectations of society and the natural pace of personal growth. The pressure to decide one’s fate too early in life creates a burden that stifles the soul’s natural unfolding.

In the ancient world, a young person’s path was often shaped by a mentor or the traditions of their tribe or family. Consider the life of Alexander the Great, who, although he began his military campaigns at a young age, was prepared by the wisdom of his father, King Philip II, and by the teachings of Aristotle. But even for Alexander, the fullness of his purpose and destiny would unfold only through experience, struggle, and the passage of time. It was not simply instruction that shaped him, but the real world of battle, leadership, and sacrifice. His journey was not determined in the abstract; it was realized through the grit and hardship of life itself. Rooney Mara’s words reflect a deep wisdom—growth cannot be rushed, nor can purpose be dictated before one has had the chance to live.

In the modern world, however, society places expectations upon the youth that are unnatural and even unjust. From an early age, we are asked to make life-altering decisions before we’ve had the time to fully understand our own hearts. This mirrors the challenge faced by Socrates in ancient Athens, who famously proclaimed that the unexamined life is not worth living. Yet Socrates did not rush others to have all the answers at once. His method was one of dialogue, questioning, and reflection, encouraging his students to search deeply within themselves to understand their true nature. Young people today, however, are often forced to face a society that expects them to have a fully-formed identity and a clear vision of their future, even before they understand who they are in the present.

The truth, as Mara suggests, is that most young people do not know what they want to do because they have not yet had the chance to truly experience life. Childhood and adolescence should be a time of discovery, of learning through exploration and failure, not a time to be burdened by expectations that are disconnected from the realities of adult life. The story of Helen Keller, for example, is a testament to this. Born with the profound challenges of both deafness and blindness, she was not bound by society’s narrow definitions of what she could or could not achieve. It was through experience, struggle, and self-discovery that she found her voice, becoming a powerful advocate for people with disabilities. Had society forced her to define her life before she had the chance to experience it fully, she might never have become the force for change that she was.

In the face of these societal pressures, young people must learn to trust in their own journey. There is no wisdom in trying to know everything about life before one has lived it. The path of wisdom requires time, patience, and a willingness to embrace the unknown. The philosopher Confucius taught that knowledge comes not from rigid instruction, but from a life lived in service to others, in service to virtue, and in the ongoing pursuit of self-awareness. His teachings emphasize that, like a tree, our roots must first go deep into the soil of experience before we can bear fruit. To rush this process is to sever the natural growth of the soul.

The lesson we can draw from Rooney Mara's words, then, is one of patience and understanding. Society may demand answers, but the journey of self-discovery cannot be hurried. Youth is not a time to define the rest of one’s life, but a time to explore, to make mistakes, and to gain insight into one’s own character. The real world is a teacher in its own right—it is through facing challenges, engaging with others, and taking risks that we begin to understand who we truly are. Life’s purpose is often revealed through living, not through preordained decisions.

Let us, therefore, honor the natural unfolding of our lives and the lives of those around us. Let us not be quick to define ourselves or to force others to define their futures before they have had the time to truly know themselves. As we grow older, let us offer our wisdom to the younger generations, not as a set of rigid answers, but as a reminder that the journey itself is where the answers are found. Just as Socrates encouraged his students to seek truth in dialogue, so too should we embrace the questions of life as opportunities for growth and discovery. Purpose, after all, is not something that can be set in stone at a young age—it is something that is shaped by the trials, the struggles, and the lessons learned along the way.