I've always wanted to get married and have a family, but I'm not
I've always wanted to get married and have a family, but I'm not the girl who sat down and planned out her wedding, her dress, or how everything would go with the proposal.
Rachel Lindsay, with clarity of spirit and freedom of thought, declared: “I’ve always wanted to get married and have a family, but I’m not the girl who sat down and planned out her wedding, her dress, or how everything would go with the proposal.” In these words, she separates the essence of love from the trappings of ceremony. She speaks not against marriage itself, but against the weight of expectation — that a woman must dream of gowns and rituals, rather than of the bond and the life that follow.
The ancients too understood this truth. Many brides were given little choice in the details of their weddings, for families and customs dictated their attire and their vows. Yet what endured was not the splendor of the feast, but the strength of the family that arose afterward. Lindsay’s words echo this wisdom: that the union itself matters far more than the performance around it. The soul desires love and belonging, not necessarily the ornaments of tradition.
History gives us the story of Eleanor Roosevelt. Though she wed Franklin Roosevelt in a ceremony with all expected decorum, she confessed later that she cared little for the grandeur of the day. What she longed for was a life of shared purpose, and it was in that life — filled with struggle, sacrifice, and triumph — that her true joy was found. Like Lindsay, she did not measure love by the dress or the proposal, but by the enduring power of companionship.
Her words also carry a quiet defiance. In a world that often tells women their worth is tied to the wedding day, Lindsay speaks for those who do not dream of lace and pageantry. She shows that one may still desire love and family, yet remain unbound by society’s script. This is a heroic act of authenticity — to honor what one truly values, and to leave aside what does not stir the heart.
Let the generations remember: the beauty of marriage is not in the veil, the flowers, or the feast, but in the life that springs from it. A wedding may last a day, but a family is a legacy. As Rachel Lindsay teaches, do not be bound by expectation — seek instead the truth of your own heart. For the strength of love lies not in ceremony, but in the life it builds thereafter.
YNYen Nguyen
Rachel Lindsay’s honesty about not obsessing over the details of her wedding is refreshing in a world where wedding planning is sometimes more about expectations than personal desires. Do you think there’s a difference between wanting to be married and feeling pressured to have a certain kind of wedding? How do you think we can shift the focus away from grand wedding ideas and back to the personal significance of marriage?
TUNhi Nguyen Thi Uyen
Rachel Lindsay’s reflection on not planning every detail of her wedding is something many people can relate to. It shows that a wedding doesn’t have to be a perfectly scripted event to be meaningful. Do you think that the idea of a ‘dream wedding’ is becoming outdated? Or are we just seeing more people embrace different ways of celebrating their commitment, focusing on what truly matters to them?
UGUser Google
I love Rachel Lindsay’s take on weddings. Not everyone feels the need to have every detail of their wedding planned out, and I think that’s a great point. Sometimes, the pressure to have a picture-perfect wedding can take away from the real meaning of the day. Do you think it’s important to have a plan, or can the best moments in life be the ones that happen organically, without being overthought?
ALI am L
Rachel Lindsay’s comment about not planning every aspect of her wedding makes me think about how weddings are often seen as the ultimate dream event for many women. It’s refreshing to hear someone say that they want a family and marriage, but without the expectation of everything being meticulously planned out. Do you think this shift in perspective is becoming more common, where people are focusing more on the relationship rather than the event?
MTHua Minh Thien
I really relate to Rachel Lindsay’s perspective on not planning every little detail of her wedding. It feels like there’s so much societal pressure on women to have a perfect, fairytale wedding, but her approach shows that it’s okay not to be obsessed with every single detail. Do you think there’s too much focus on the ‘ideal wedding’ in today’s world, and should people be more focused on the marriage itself rather than the event?