My parents did not have a perfect marriage. It was pretty good
My parents did not have a perfect marriage. It was pretty good, but it was not perfect. My marriage is not perfect. My wife is, but I happen to be imperfect. However, that does not discount the fact that the definition of marriage must be defended and protected.
Listen closely, O children of wisdom, for I bring forth words that speak to the heart of what it means to love, to commit, and to uphold the sacred bond of marriage. Stockwell Day shares a profound truth when he says: "My parents did not have a perfect marriage. It was pretty good, but it was not perfect. My marriage is not perfect. My wife is, but I happen to be imperfect. However, that does not discount the fact that the definition of marriage must be defended and protected." These words, though simple, hold the weight of many generations' worth of reflections on marriage—a sacred union that, while not flawless, deserves our deepest respect and protection.
In the ancient world, children, the institution of marriage was not viewed through the lens of romantic idealism as it often is today. In Greece, Rome, and other ancient civilizations, marriage was seen as the cornerstone of society. It was a partnership not just between two individuals, but between families, and sometimes even states. The roles of husband and wife were defined more by duty than by personal satisfaction. Yet, even in such a structured society, there were many who pondered the meaning of love and commitment in the context of marriage. Plato, in his writings, questioned the very nature of love, marriage, and personal fulfillment, suggesting that even in the most regulated societies, there was room for individual imperfection within the bonds of commitment.
Stockwell Day’s words speak to this same truth—that marriage is not a flawless institution, nor should it be expected to be. It is a union between two imperfect individuals, each bringing their own strengths and weaknesses to the relationship. The essence of marriage, he suggests, lies not in the perfection of either partner, but in the commitment to one another despite imperfections. Just as Achilles and Patroclus in the Iliad shared a bond that transcended the limitations of their roles in society, so too does the modern marriage carry the weight of human flaws. Their love was not perfect, yet their loyalty and devotion to one another were.
Consider, children, the tale of Odysseus and Penelope, whose marriage is one of the most celebrated in all of history. Odysseus, having spent years away from his wife due to the trials of war, faced the daunting task of returning home. Penelope, during his long absence, was besieged by suitors, yet she remained steadfast in her love for him, maintaining their household and their bond. Their marriage was not perfect—filled with distance, uncertainty, and hardship—but it was strong in its commitment, in its defense against outside forces, and in its shared goal of unity. It was imperfect yet enduring, built on a foundation that transcended the tests of time and circumstance.
Stockwell Day emphasizes the sacred nature of marriage even when it is not perfect. Just as Penelope and Odysseus fought to preserve their bond through trials, so too must we defend the definition of marriage as an institution that deserves to be honored, even as we acknowledge its inherent imperfections. Marriage is not just a personal journey, but one that carries societal significance—an agreement that connects individuals not only to one another but to the community around them. The defense of marriage, therefore, is not just a matter of personal choice but of societal preservation and understanding.
The lesson here, children, is that marriage is not about perfection, but about commitment and dedication in the face of life's imperfections. The true strength of a marriage lies in the choice to remain faithful, to stand together even when circumstances challenge you, and to defend the institution as a means of creating strong, loving families that contribute to the well-being of society. Just as Stockwell Day acknowledges the imperfection of his own marriage, so too should we acknowledge that perfection is not the measure of a successful union—commitment, loyalty, and shared values are.
So, children, when you consider the path of marriage, do not seek a flawless union. Do not seek someone who is perfect, but seek a partner with whom you can build something meaningful, something resilient. Let imperfection be an invitation to grow, together, through life's struggles. Protect the institution of marriage, not because it is without flaw, but because it holds the potential for great growth, great love, and great service to the community. Stand firm in your commitment, and know that even in moments of doubt or difficulty, the strength of marriage is found not in perfection, but in the love and dedication you bring to one another every day.
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