
The most important thing to Ben and me was starting a family, so
The most important thing to Ben and me was starting a family, so as soon as we got engaged, we booked Gurney's in Montauk - which is just a few miles down the beach from our summer home - as our wedding venue a full year and a half out, and then we immediately started trying to get pregnant.






Hearken, O children of legacy and devotion, to the words of Jennifer Hyman, who speaks of the deepest desires of her heart and her beloved Ben. She declares that the most important thing to them was not merely the celebration of a wedding, but the beginning of a family. Thus, as soon as they became engaged, they carefully prepared for both milestones: securing their wedding venue a year and a half in advance at Gurney’s in Montauk, near the shores where their summer home rested, and immediately turning their hearts and efforts toward the sacred act of bringing new life into the world.
In this utterance lies a profound teaching: that the truest purpose of marriage, for many, is not merely the ceremony itself, but the continuation of life and lineage. Across the ages, from the dynasties of ancient China to the royal houses of Europe, marriage was honored not only as a union of love but as a covenant to nurture future generations. Hyman’s words reflect this timeless truth, showing that while the wedding is a single day, the creation of a family is an enduring legacy.
The choice of Gurney’s, a place near their home and heart, also reveals the value of intention and connection to place. Throughout history, sacred unions were often celebrated in locations rich with meaning: beneath ancestral trees, within temples, or at the edge of beloved rivers. By selecting a venue close to their summer home, Hyman and Ben bound their vows to a space already filled with shared memories, ensuring their wedding would be grounded in the continuity of their lives together.
Their simultaneous planning of a wedding and pursuit of parenthood reflects the ancient rhythm of preparation and growth. Just as farmers plant seeds in spring to reap harvests in autumn, so too did Hyman and Ben sow the seeds of their future even as they prepared to celebrate the present. This mirrors the teachings of the sages, who spoke of harmony between the joy of today and the promise of tomorrow, for a life well-lived must balance both.
Consider the tale of Queen Elizabeth of York, whose marriage to King Henry VII united warring factions and birthed the Tudor dynasty. Her wedding was not only a political alliance but also the foundation for a family whose descendants would shape a nation’s history. In the same way, every couple who turns toward parenthood carries the weight of future generations, shaping destinies through the choices they make today.
Thus, O seekers, let this lesson guide your hearts: honor the ceremonies of union, but remember that they are only the gateway to a greater journey. Whether through the creation of children or through acts of service and love, let your marriage be a vessel of continuity and purpose, so that the joy of your wedding day may ripple outward, touching not only your own lives but the lives of those yet to come.
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