We need sex education in schools, but we need it at home first.

Hear now the words of Rod McKuen, poet of the heart and voice of the common soul: “We need sex education in schools, but we need it at home first. We need parents to learn the names of the teachers who are teaching their children. We need families to question day-care centers, to question other children and their own as to what goes on.” In these words he speaks not only of education, but of the sacred duty of the family, and of the eternal truth that wisdom begins not in the halls of institutions, but in the hearth of the home. For schools may instruct, but it is in the home that the foundation of trust, safety, and understanding is laid.

McKuen reminds us that education is not only a matter of knowledge, but of care. He points to a truth long forgotten by many: that parents cannot simply send their children into the world and expect others to do all the guiding. They must remain vigilant, involved, questioning, and engaged. For the guardians of a child’s mind and spirit are not only teachers and officials, but mothers and fathers who shape their early sense of right and wrong, of truth and dignity. A house that does not speak openly of these matters leaves its children to wander in silence, vulnerable to confusion and harm.

History offers us lessons of what happens when families abdicate this responsibility. In many societies, silence around matters of the body and the heart left generations of youth to learn from rumor, from shame, or from predators. It was not knowledge that endangered them, but ignorance. Contrast this with cultures where family spoke openly, where parents guided children with honesty and care. There, the young grew into adults better prepared to love with respect, to protect themselves, and to honor the dignity of others. This is the wisdom McKuen calls us back to: that the first school is the home, and the first teachers are the parents.

And yet, his words also remind us of another duty: vigilance. He calls upon families not only to speak within their own walls, but to know the world into which their children go. Parents must learn the names of the teachers, for in knowing names, they affirm connection and accountability. They must question day-care centers, for in asking, they protect. They must even ask of their children: “What happened today? What did you see? What did you learn?” For a child’s silence, if left unchecked, may hide both joy and sorrow, knowledge and danger. Families who listen and question build a fortress of awareness around their young.

The deeper meaning is this: the raising of a child is not a task that can be handed wholly to schools or to society. Institutions are but scaffolds; the true foundation is the family. If parents neglect this, then no amount of schooling can fully mend the gaps. If parents engage, then schooling becomes a supplement to wisdom already rooted. McKuen’s words are a call to responsibility, to intimacy, to courage—the courage to speak where silence once reigned, the courage to question where complacency once slept.

The lesson for us is clear: do not imagine that the shaping of your child belongs to others. Take ownership of their growth. Speak of hard truths before the world twists them into lies. Ask questions, even when uncomfortable, for in the asking you show love. Do not shy from naming what is sacred, what is dangerous, what is human—for in doing so, you give your children tools to live wisely.

Practical action follows from this wisdom: tonight, sit with your children and ask them of their day. Learn the names of their teachers, the rhythms of their schools, the stories of their friends. Do not wait for trouble before you speak, but speak in times of calm, so that trust is woven strong before storms come. Let the home be the first classroom, and the parents the first guides. Then, when the schools teach, they will not plant seeds upon barren ground, but upon soil already rich with love and truth.

So remember always McKuen’s call: education begins at home, with the vigilance of families and the courage of parents. Do not leave this sacred task to others. For the home is the first temple, the child the most precious treasure, and the family the eternal guardian of both heart and mind.