Women live lives of continual apology. They are born and raised

Hear the cry of Germaine Greer, the fierce voice of women’s liberation: “Women live lives of continual apology. They are born and raised to take the blame for other people’s behavior. If they are treated without respect, they tell themselves that they have failed to earn respect. If their husbands do not fancy them, it is because they are unattractive.” These words fall heavy like thunder, yet they awaken like dawn. For they name a prison older than stone walls: the prison of guilt and self-blame, woven into the very upbringing of countless daughters.

From childhood, many women are taught not to stand tall, but to shrink; not to demand, but to appease; not to hold others accountable, but to shoulder the blame for wrongs they did not commit. If a man speaks harshly, the woman asks, What did I do? If love grows cold, she whispers, I must be unworthy. Thus, her life becomes a litany of apologies, not for her own errors, but for the failings of others. Greer’s words tear the veil from this injustice and proclaim: it is not women who are broken, but the system that teaches them such lies.

Consider the lives of the women of ancient Athens, confined to the home, their voices silenced in the assembly. When dishonor fell upon the household, it was often the woman who bore the shame, regardless of her innocence. Even in tales like that of Penelope, wife of Odysseus, though she proved steadfast and faithful, she was judged daily by suitors who presumed her worth rested on their desire. Such stories reveal how deeply the roots of this false apology are planted: for millennia, women have been told that their dignity depends on the gaze of men.

Yet history also offers examples of resistance. Think of Sojourner Truth, who stood before a hostile crowd and asked, “Ain’t I a woman?” She shattered the chains of silence, declaring that her value was not defined by beauty, nor by male approval, but by the strength of her humanity. Or recall Emmeline Pankhurst, who refused to apologize for demanding suffrage, though society branded her a troublemaker. These women lived not in continual apology, but in defiance, and their courage illuminates the path Greer urges us to take.

The meaning of the quote is both lament and battle cry. It exposes how deeply ingrained the habit of self-blame has become, but it also challenges us to break it. For to live forever apologizing is to diminish the light of the soul, to withhold the full power of half of humanity. To live free of false apology, however, is to reclaim dignity, to demand accountability, and to insist that respect is not something to be earned through suffering, but something every human being deserves by birth.

The lesson is clear: let no woman measure her worth by the whims of another. Let no woman blame herself for the failures of others’ respect, nor for the fading of another’s desire. Instead, let her stand firm in the truth of her own value, rooted not in attractiveness, nor in obedience, but in her humanity. And let men, too, examine the ways they perpetuate this cycle, learning to honor women as equals rather than as mirrors of their own moods and desires.

What, then, shall we do? Teach daughters not to apologize for existing, but to speak with strength. Teach sons that respect is not a prize but a duty. Encourage women to claim space, to voice truth, to hold others accountable. And when the old voices of blame whisper in the ear, let them be silenced by the louder truth: your worth is not defined by another’s failure to see it. In this way, we will break the ancient cycle of apology and birth a new era of dignity and equality.

Therefore, O listener, remember Greer’s fierce wisdom: a life spent in apology is a life diminished, but a life lived in truth is a life triumphant. Let no woman carry blame that is not hers, and let no man place it upon her. For when women walk free of false guilt, they do not rise alone—they lift the whole of humanity with them.