Mary Calderone

Mary Calderone – Life, Career, and Famous Insights

Discover the life of Mary Steichen Calderone (1904–1998), pioneering American physician, public health advocate, and sex education reformer. Explore her groundbreaking work, philosophy, legacy, and memorable statements.

Introduction

Mary Steichen Calderone (July 1, 1904 – October 24, 1998) was an American physician, educator, author, and pioneer in the field of sex education and reproductive health advocacy. As a trailblazer, she helped transform how sexuality is discussed in the United States—arguing that sex should be understood as a natural part of human life and deserve formal, responsible education. Her leadership roles in Planned Parenthood and the founding of SIECUS (Sex Information and Education Council of the United States) left a lasting imprint on public health, education, and social discourse.

Early Life and Family

Mary Calderone was born Mary Rose Steichen on July 1, 1904, in New York City.
Her parents were Edward Steichen, a renowned Luxembourgish-American photographer, and Clara Emma Smith, a singer.
She had a younger sister, Charlotte “Kate” Rodina Steichen.

Though born in New York, she spent portions of her childhood in France (in Paris and the village of Voulangis) where the family had relocated.
When World War I erupted, her family fled back to the U.S., and her parents separated not long after.
She went to live with family friends in New York, and attended the Brearley School for her secondary education.

From a young age, Calderone was exposed to artistic, intellectual, and progressive circles (because of her father and his acquaintances), which influenced her open mind and later advocacy.

In her early adult years, she married actor W. Lon Martin in 1926 and had two daughters, Nell and Linda.
After their divorce in 1933, Mary suffered the tragic loss of her daughter Nell (who died of pneumonia).
These personal challenges—including the loss and her career changes—played a role in her deeper reflection on purpose and vocation.

Later she remarried Frank A. Calderone (in 1941), who was a public health leader and World Health Organization pioneer.
Together they had two more daughters, Francesca (born 1943) and Maria (born 1946).

Youth, Education & Turning to Medicine

Mary Steichen Calderone’s early adult path was far from linear:

• She graduated from Vassar College in 1925 with an A.B. in Chemistry.

• Initially, she pursued a theatrical path and studied at the American Laboratory Theatre for around three years.

• But the combination of personal tragedy, a search for meaning, and a period of introspection (including aptitude testing) led her to reorient her life.

• At age 35, she entered medical school and earned her M.D. from the University of Rochester in 1939.

• She then studied public health at Columbia University, obtaining a Master of Public Health (M.P.H.) in 1942.

• During her MPH work, she served as a health-officer trainee in New York’s Lower East Side District Health Center.

• It was during this period she met and worked alongside Frank Calderone, whom she eventually married.

Her medical and public health training gave her the credentials, knowledge, and credibility to address taboo topics in a professional, scientific manner.

Career & Achievements

Mary Calderone’s professional life was characterized by advocacy, audacity, and pioneering efforts. She is most known for her leadership in Planned Parenthood and for founding SIECUS.

Early Medical and Public Health Work

• From 1949 to 1953, she worked as a school physician in Great Neck, New York.

• During that time, she encountered firsthand the lack of responsible sex education, widespread ignorance about contraception, and the negative public health outcomes tied to them.

Leadership at Planned Parenthood

• In 1953, she became the first female Medical Director of the Planned Parenthood Federation of America.

• During her approximately eleven-year tenure (1953–1964), she helped shift the organization from a somewhat cautious stance on birth control and abortion toward a more medically grounded and socially assertive posture.

• In 1955, she organized the groundbreaking national conference “Abortion in the United States”, bringing medical professionals into public discourse on the reform of abortion laws.

• After the first oral contraceptive was approved by the FDA in 1960, Calderone lobbied professional bodies such as the American Medical Association (AMA) to recognize contraception as standard medical practice.

• Her efforts culminated in 1964 when the AMA reversed its earlier policy that prohibited doctors from providing contraceptive information to patients.

Founding and Leading SIECUS

• In May 1964, she resigned from Planned Parenthood to cofound SIECUS (Sex Information and Education Council of the United States), and became its executive director.

• Under her leadership, SIECUS promoted comprehensive sexuality education in schools, emphasizing that sex was not merely an act, but a dimension of human development.

• She traveled extensively across the U.S., speaking to teachers, parents, students, doctors, religious leaders, and policymakers.

• Her approach expanded discourse to include puberty, consent, gender relations, and the emotional side of sexuality—not just prevention of pregnancy or disease.

• Calderone remained executive director until the mid-1970s (around 1975) and then served as President until her retirement in 1982.

Later Years and Academic Work

• After retiring from leadership at SIECUS, she taught as an adjunct professor in human sexuality at New York University from 1982 to about 1988.

• She authored and co-authored books aimed at educating the public:
  • The Family Book About Sexuality (1981) with Eric W. Johnson
  • Talking With Your Child About Sex: Questions and Answers for Children from Birth to Puberty (1982) with James W. Ramey
  • Earlier works include Release from Sexual Tensions (1960), Manual of Contraceptive Practice (1964), and Abortion in the United States (1958) (as editor).

• Even after formal retirement, she remained a public speaker and advocate for years until her death.

Historical Context & Challenges

Mary Calderone’s work unfolded during a period when sexuality, contraception, and abortion were taboo and heavily stigmatized.

• She confronted cultural norms that regarded public discussion of sex as immoral or dangerous—especially for women.

• Her proposals—such as introducing age-appropriate sex education even in kindergarten—led to fierce opposition from conservative and religious groups, who accused her and SIECUS of undermining morality or promoting promiscuity.

• In 1968, the pamphlet Is the School House the Proper Place to Teach Raw Sex? by Christian Crusade leaders attacked Calderone and SIECUS, accusing them of misconduct and conspiracy.

• Congressman John Rarick of Louisiana read criticisms into the Congressional Record, linking sex education to communist plots.

• Over time, because of ideological pushback and political pressures, support for comprehensive sex education fluctuated. Calderone’s influence later waned, but her foundations remained.

• Her Quaker upbringing and her belief in universalism (that sexuality is a human universal) shaped her philosophy of inclusive, open education.

Legacy and Influence

Mary Calderone’s influence is deep, complex, and still under debate. Some of her key contributions include:

• Legitimizing sex education: She shifted sex education from moralistic abstinence messages toward a public health–based, rights-oriented paradigm.

• Integrating contraception into mainstream medicine: Her work influenced major medical institutions (like AMA) to accept birth control as part of standard practice.

• Institution building: Through SIECUS, she established a permanent organizational structure that supported educators, produced materials, and advocated policy.

• Cultural change: Her advocacy contributed to altering how American society conceives of sexuality, consent, and children’s education.

• Inspiring later research and activism: Her pioneering role paved way for broader acceptance of sexual health as a valid academic and policy domain.

• Honors and recognition: She received numerous awards including the Elizabeth Blackwell Award, Margaret Sanger Award, induction into the National Women’s Hall of Fame, and other lifetime honors.

Her legacy is not without controversy—some critics argue her approach was too medicalized; others dispute the pace or content of educational reforms. Still, she is widely acknowledged as a foundational figure in American sex education.

Personality, Philosophy & Approach

Mary Calderone was characterized by the following traits and convictions:

• Courage and boldness: She broached topics others avoided, in a time when such discussion was daring.

• Scientific rigor & professional legitimacy: By combining medical credentials with public advocacy, she added authority to her positions.

• Compassion and respect: She argued that sex education should be respectful, not shaming, treating people as moral agents.

• Universalism and inclusiveness: Her Quaker values led her to see sexuality as universal and deserving of open, fact-based education.

• Pragmatic idealism: She balanced visionary goals (comprehensive sex education) with pragmatic steps (working with medical associations, schools, religious leaders) to find affective change.

Selected Quotes & Insights

While Calderone is less quoted than some public figures, several statements reflect her core beliefs:

• “We’re still a sexophobic society, afraid of the wrong things for the wrong reason.”

• Her writings and speeches often emphasized that sexuality should be treated as part of being human, not something shameful or secret.

• Through SIECUS and her published works, she urged educators and parents to provide accurate, age-appropriate information rather than silence.

Lessons from Mary Calderone

1. Expertise + advocacy = influence
   Calderone’s medical credentials gave her credibility to push norms in public health and education.

2. Persist amid opposition
   She faced ideological backlash yet continued advocating for change over decades.

3. Institutional anchoring matters
   Creating SIECUS anchored her ideas into structures that outlasted her personal leadership.

4. Holistic understanding of sexuality
   She insisted sex education encompass biology, emotional life, relationships, consent—not just disease or reproduction.

5. Bridge dialogues
   She engaged medical associations, schools, religious leaders, parents, policymakers—rather than preaching only to allies.

6. Values matter
   Her Quaker belief in universality and nonjudgment shaped her inclusive, rights-based approach.

Conclusion

Mary Steichen Calderone was a courageous pioneer who reshaped public discourse around sexuality, contraception, and education in the United States. Through her roles in Planned Parenthood and SIECUS, her writings, lectures, and mentorship, she left a foundation for how we talk, teach, and think about human sexuality today. While her work remains contested in some quarters, her legacy as a foundational figure in sex education is indelible.

If you’d like, I can also compile a timeline of her life, deeper analysis of her educational materials, or comparisons with later sex education reformers.