A role model can teach you to love and respect yourself.

“A role model can teach you to love and respect yourself.” Thus spoke Tionne Watkins, known to many as T-Boz of the legendary group TLC — a woman whose own life has been a testament to resilience, authenticity, and inner strength. Her words shine with the quiet fire of experience, for they are not spoken from luxury or ease, but from the hard-won wisdom of one who has struggled, endured, and risen. In this reflection lies a timeless truth: that self-love and self-respect, though born within us, often need a mirror — a living example — to awaken and take shape. That mirror is the role model, the one whose life becomes a light for others lost in the dark.

Watkins’ words come from a soul who has seen both fame and fragility. As a woman who faced chronic illness, public scrutiny, and personal trials, she came to understand that strength is not born from pride, but from self-acceptance. Her message speaks especially to the young, to those who search for themselves in a world eager to tell them who to be. She reminds us that the right role model does not simply inspire imitation — they inspire transformation. They awaken in us the courage to embrace our flaws, to honor our boundaries, and to see beauty in our uniqueness. A true role model does not make you worship them; they make you see yourself as worthy of love.

The ancients, too, knew the power of example. Aristotle once said that “we become just by doing just acts,” and often, we learn those acts by observing the virtuous. In every age, societies have sought figures — heroes, teachers, elders — whose lives embodied what words alone could not teach. The role model, then, is a modern echo of that ancient mentor — not a perfect being, but one who walks the path of truth with courage. By seeing their strength, we learn to cultivate our own; by seeing their struggles, we learn that dignity is not the absence of failure, but the grace to rise again.

Consider the story of Maya Angelou, who lived through trauma, silence, and hardship, yet emerged as a poet of power and compassion. To countless women, men, and children, she became not merely a voice, but a mirror of hope. Through her words — “You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them” — she taught generations to reclaim their worth. She did not promise perfection, but she modeled strength through vulnerability, confidence through humility, and pride through perseverance. To love oneself, she taught, is not vanity, but survival; to respect oneself is not arrogance, but truth. And this is the very essence of Watkins’ quote: that the presence of a true example can ignite a revolution within the soul.

But there is another lesson hidden in her words — that not all role models are chosen; some are created. Every person who learns to love and respect themselves becomes, in turn, a guide for others. When you live with integrity, when you forgive yourself and stand in your worth, you become the teacher you once sought. The chain of inspiration never ends — one heart heals, and through that healing, others find courage. Thus, in Watkins’ wisdom, we find a call to responsibility: to live so that our strength becomes a refuge for those still finding theirs.

In a world that too often teaches us to compete, to compare, to feel lesser or unworthy, her words sound like the voice of a mother, gentle but firm: “Love yourself.” Not because you are flawless, but because you are human. “Respect yourself.” Not because others approve, but because your life has sacred worth. A role model teaches this not through speeches, but through living — through authenticity, through resilience, through kindness that begins at home, within the self. For when the soul respects itself, the world cannot break it.

So, my children, let this be the lesson you carry forward: seek not idols, but examples. Follow not those who demand your admiration, but those who awaken your own. When you find someone whose light helps you see your own reflection clearly — cherish them, learn from them, and then become like them. Live in such a way that others may say of you, “because of them, I began to love myself again.”

For as Tionne Watkins teaches, the greatest gift one human can give another is not advice, not riches, not even comfort — it is the courage to see themselves as worthy. To love oneself is to rise above the world’s noise. To respect oneself is to become unshakable. And to live as a model of that love and respect is to leave a legacy that will outlive flesh, fame, and time — a light passed from soul to soul, generation to generation, forever.